"Protective Factors"

Out of curiosity I went to a book discussion meeting at a local library.  The book came out a few years ago to help parents keep their children drug-free.  I hadn't read the book and I wasn't even planning on going but changed my mind at the last minute.   
There was one thing I knew that's written in the book, before I attended the meeting, because I read an excerpt of it on-line when it first came out and it bothered me. Apparently, everyone in the meeting agreed with his idea that you should be honest with your child - if the subject of drugs (that includes alcohol and cigarettes) is brought up and your child asks you if you ever engaged in this behavior.  Although my kids never asked me ~ I recall my mom telling me (when I was a kid - of course) that she smoked cigarettes but quit when she learned they weren't healthy for her.  I remember thinking ~ "Well - she quit ~ what's the big deal?" I hate to admit it but I did for a few years when I was young.  I know I thought I was invincible - that the cigarette addiction wouldn't be an issue.  
Well - in the same breath ` the subject of "scare tactics" (such as wrecked automobiles on the front lawn at high schools around prom time) came up and I knew that studies have indicated that these don't work for kids for the same reason ~ invisibility.  I don't understand how this is different.  My mom wasn't using scare tactics but I had that same thought - that it wouldn't happen to me.  
I was quiet during this area of discussion and even when the "protective factors" subject came up.  I had an issue with this too.  It isn't just about what was in the book but the general idea that "if you follow this route" - you can protect your child.  I have a problem with it in two areas ~ one: Of course if you follow all the thoughts on the best way to raise your child - their chances are better that they won't BUT:  two ~ the message isn't loud enough that there are kids who have a much greater risk of developing an addiction AND that there are no guarantees.  This is where the guilt comes from ~ from the message if "you do this" you can raise a drug-free child.  
That said - I know I could have done things differently but - what parent doesn't say that?  Parents need to hear both sides.  Perhaps if they use a risk "check-list" (like we present in our program) they can be even more vigilant than they would normally.