Procrastinating?
Hubs and I decided to try to contact the new caseworker before we approach the other grandparents about the four-day weekend visit with the GKs. I feel cautiously okay about contacting them without knowing the official details, but housing project lawyers who call us racist names are more than a little bit frightening to us. Meet the other grandfather with a generous plethora of extortion jokes to spice the bitter stew. We arenae ethnic enough for and always more advataged than racists of any stripe, nor are we well-studied enough to predict what creative twist will come from the lawsuit loto tables. Do I have a right to shed a tear at the thought of my grandchildren being raised to call me racist names? I wish the very thought was absurd, but it has presented in every interracial marriage I have been close to, especially the ones with multi-lingual roots. 'Tis a fine, fuzzy and twisting line between racism and racial pride.
While I wait out the attempt the next round of caseworker contacts, it looks like I will be moving the distillation lab to the extraction room in the honey barn. When Hubs started working remotely, the empty spaces in the distillation lab were the most available space to move his work station into. I have been operating on the assumption that he would move that work station, but internet options limit that possibility. The wireless signal doesnae reach the honey barn with enough strength to fit his needs and we are hesitant to budget the expense for a second wireless connection. Cable options arenae available here at the farm.
I find myself kinda excited about moving the lab into the honey barn. The Spring bloom is on and I have missed my lab. Extracting herbal components ought to be compatible with extracting honey.
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I’m what I like to call an Eastern European mutt but have rarely faced racist comments directed at save for being criticized for being too European, my biological grandfather being a Jew and my sister calling me a communist traitor a lot growing up (don’t ask). But having been military, I saw some of the worst of racism in Europe coming out of the soldiers stationed there. Hearing drunk soldiers constantly referring to Germans as very racist terms from WWII was so offensive and made me start to feel a little bit prejudiced against Americans for how they treated anyone not American. I can’t tolerate racist comments of any kind. They get under my skin that I start to feel that red tide of anger bubbling up.
I recall going to a Asian flea market in Cheb Czech Republic with my friend who is half Egyptian and her saying loudly to be careful or they would “Jew us”. Having everyone in my grandfather’s family but his younger brother killed at Auschwitz I was livid with her. Her excuse was that she was Egyptian and therefore culturally allowed to make racist comments about Jews.
The thought that you may have to face that kind of racism from your own grandchildren turns my stomach. I’m so sorry Arfie. I’ve been seeing more and more racism rise in this country since I returned stateside and it’s sickening. My prayers and thoughts are with you that you never have to face that kind of situation.
I like the idea of you moving the lab. It sounds like a great idea.
Hugs & support & love, Arfie!
I was raised ethnic Irish. In the 50's and 60's, US born White People still had ethnic heritages. A Junior High homework assignment lead me to discover that my mother was full-blooded German with rumors of Polish blood. WWII had made her deeply ashamed of that heritage and she preferred being simply, "White." I feel like the "White" label is a mandate to drink my minimum daily requirement of bleach.
More and more I think my daily cup of bleach is far better than reliving the Texas Revolutionary War where the term, "Gringo" was born, especially when my grandchildren are on the battlefield. On Hubby's side, their Texas Gringo blood dates back to the immigrants who bought land from the Spanish Crown. The ones behind the green shirts who listened to Spanish speaking Armies taunting, "Green Go."
Ah. . . When cultures collide and/or divide. . . I really do believe WAR is an acronym for, "We Are Right."
Still no response from CPS. Moving the lab is proving to be a good channel for the nervous energy. Back to the shuffle.
Racism is just plain ugly and born of ignorance..... I so hope that nothing like that would be used as a tool to inflict pain on both you and your grandchildren Arf…..
How awful!!!..... Your grandchildren would be hurt badly if you weren't in their lives.... I hope that they will put their needs first and foremost
Huge hug.... I hope that CPS will call back soon with a positive message for all of you..... Bless you......xo
Somewhere along the way, the US grew a mainstream assumption that only White People can be racist. My family tree holds quite a few members with extended family that doesn't believe it is racist to declare the other branch of their family tree as, "Not ______ enough to be family." The blank has a pretty diverse list in it. The racial moniker you insert tells you which branch of the family tree is attacking today. I have never met my Chinese niece, but I'll bet you dollars to wishes she doesnae call me, "Gringa."
We don't have the right to say, "Ouch," but. . . Sigh. . .
For now, I'm just plying focusing tools to keep from letting myself fissure too far down those slippery slopes while I wait for that return call. Insert Tom Petty tune here. The waiting is the hardest part.
Alienating your dear GK's from anyone else who loves them would be tragic..... Huge hug..... xo
I'd like to extend that prayer to all branches of every family tree.
Healing hopes for all. No exceptions.