Predestiny?
Someone said to me today that there is a plan for our lives. The plan, according to this person, is so detailed, that the day and manner of our death was determined before we were ever born. Not the first time I've heard this, but the first time I spent more than a passing thought upon it's merit. Perhaps I never wanted to risk my faith by exposing it to the logical questions that must be asked. Our spouses were taken from us, and our hearts broken, predestined .A child is abducted and murdered, predestined. A baby is born with aids, and dies within hours, predestined. A young mother or father is killed in an accident, leaving their children heartbroken, predestined. You know... I don't think I am willing to accept these scenarios as part of some plan, or bizarre test of the stamina and sanity of those who are left behind in the wreckage. We are also taught, in many of these same faiths that accept pre-destiny, that we have the gift of free will, and our choices affect the various outcomes we experience. I don't understand how this conflict can be resolved without the outright rejection of one or the other. I believe in God. I believe we are loved beyond our understanding, and that all of our loved ones live on after their physical bodies fail. Does God intervene to change the outcome of certain situations? Does God have a plan for rebuilding our lives after devastation strikes? Or, are we on our own to struggle, and the outcome hangs in the balance, based not only on our effort level, but on more circumstances that we have little or no control over? All questions my exhausted, grieving mind cannot answer with any certainty. Why it is that all these questions are not directly answered when we ask, puzzles me. If someone I loved asked me a question of great importance to them, and I knew the answer, why would I keep it from them? I see so many of my friends on this site in such pain. Drowning in the loneliness thrust upon them because of illness or sudden death of the person they loved and counted on for support and companionship. For laughter and understanding. Why are our hearts shattered without explanation? Tonight, I have no answers, but I do hold onto the firm belief that we will be with them again, and the answers, at some point, will be ours. Until then, it sure sucks to be us.
Replies
Robert,
I, too, have struggled with the question of predestiny. Mostly I ask my self, if I known the ending of the path I chose, would I still have chosen that path. I like to think the answer is yes, because of all the love and joy Mark and I shared. Maybe I would have made some different choices along the way. Maybe not.
But I cannot imagine not sharing my life with him. So, maybe he was predestined to die at age, but free will means he could have chosen to spend them with someone other than me.
So, I count my blessings and carry on.
May
Robert,
We are so much alike in our some of our thoughts, sometimes it scares me. I ask the same questions and I WANT ANSWERS now not when I die. I always question the love that God has for us if we the human race has to go through such devastating pain and heartbreak. you know me, I have mentioned this to you before, that it doesn\'t make sense, none of it, the points you brought up are very good, so many questions on why it is the way it is, why God doesn\'t answer us now when we need to know the answers and the outcomes of this master plan, what could this plan be about I wonder, it just doesn\'t make any sense that we live whether a long or short life, why some do and some don\'t if you screw up your life or if you live your life by the bible it doesn\'t matter you are going to die young or old, It just doesn\'t make sense. There comes a time when you just question, is there really something after, I do anyway, why don\'t we know, why is it such a big secret this death we are all going to experience, If God knows that we are scared of death, of the pain some people have before they pass, or even ones who have none, how is it determined who will and won\'t feel pain, who will or won\'t have a tragic death, who young or old will die Why doesn\'t he keep us from that fear and pain, what is Gods role in all this. If God created man then he must be the one who creates our end also. So why is it such a mystery?
Death scares the hell out of me even if I believe there is something after it it will not be the same as it was here and that scares me, I don\'t want to die but know someday it will happen but the how part is frightening also. So many questions like you said in your post, but no answers for us here.
And yes it does SUCK for us here, I have some other choice words but I will leave them in my head for now.
hope you and Mr. Matt had a better day today and better tomorrow
you are a dear Robert.
Your friend from SNOWY Minnesota
Laurie, always here for you and Matt ;)
Well spoken May. Perhaps the two scenarios can coexist. I, too have asked myself if I knew that Sharry would be taken from me so soon, and that Matt would be born autistic, would I have asked that lovely woman to dance that night, knowing the struggles and pain that would occur along with the love and joy they have brought to my life. My answer, like yours, is an emphatic yes, yes a million times over. As Garth brooks said: \"Could have missed the pain, but I\'d have had to miss the dance\"
I know exactly what you mean Laurie. So many questions we aren\'t able to answer. One of my favorite songs by Rush has a line in it that says: If we\'re so much the same like I always hear, why such different fortunes and fates. Such a lot of pain on this Earth, it\'s somehow so badly arranged\" As confusing as it all seems though, I believe wholeheartedly that God loves us. Loves our spouses even more somehow than we do, and has them safe, loved, and happy in an existence far better than this. We will join them, and all these questions you and I have will be answered. It just frustrates me to see all of us suffer in the meantime, and I struggle with why this secrecy exists here and now. Don\'t let my frustration tonight shake your faith that Steven is alive and well, and waiting for you.
Robert you sort of said it for all of us. I always thought that when someone died their soul immediately went into the body of a newborn person but I know where Jack\'s physical body is, at the cemetery, because I saw it. If God does indeed love us why are we all suffering so. Jack always used to say that God never promised us a rose garden. I always thought of myself as a religious person and now I have so many doubts and questions it only adds to the way I am feeling and that is pretty bad. I want so much to put my arms around Jack and tell him how very much I love him and since that cannot happen I am even more tortured. I too wonder if I could have known this when I first met my Jack would I have gone along with it when he persued me - at the time and for 64 years I loved it, but this life I am being forced to live makes me wonder - Maybe God knew what a wonderful man you were and that when Sharry was called \"home\" you were the one person capable of taking care of and loving your precious Matthew. We will all find out someday, but meanwhile I pray you find some happiness for you and your beloved son. Sending love and prayers for two \"neat\" guys, You and Matt - Agnes
I found myself, in prayer, asking God why, driving to work one morning. And I feel that I heard God\'s voice. The words that came to my mind were-I didn\'t want him to suffer anymore so I brought him home to be with me. I then knew how much he loved Aaron more than any of us on earth could. He understood Aaron\'s miserable time toward the end and allowed him to follow through on his plans to take his life. I believe that the Lord was merciful to him in his final moments. I definitely believe and remember telling my husband that God has a plan for each and every person. I have to hold onto my faith in the Lord. He does not fail us. His plan is bigger and more far reaching than we can comprehend. I don\'t really believe in predestination. It is a heavily debated subject among Christians. God knows all things, but I don\'t think it means its pre-destined. I don\'t know if I would have married Aaron if I knew all of the pain that would result from it. But it was part of God\'s plan, so he couldn\'t show me the future or I would have gone down a different path and my children wouldn\'t be. This is an awful time either way. Take care and God bless you and your son.
Thank you Stephanie. I am sure that voice was real, and with that knowledge, comes peace for you, knowing Aaron is home and loved. I wonder if God shows us the direction at times, but allows the outcome to be determined by our actions, and sometimes by circumstances that He does not intervene to prevent, as in some of the examples I previously wrote about. How much, and when He directs our outcomes, is, I guess, something we will know on the other side. I am so happy for you, that you received your answer. I know it doesn\'t take the heartache away,and the road is still long, but that gift of peace will be the rock solid foundation for you to build on. God bless you and those awesome kids!