Plodding through the day.

The depression and loneliness have hit me hard today. I miss her smile, her touch, her laugh. I miss hearing her voice in the house. My heart is breaking so much I just want to die. I have no ambition, no drive, no focus. I pray for Gods grace and mercy almost every moment of the day. I just wish I could wake up from this nightmare and it all be over with. I wish I could forgive myself for the things I said and did. I wish I could take them all back. I wish I had never said or done them. I wish I could cry. The tears never seem to come. There is just this heavy, dark, sorrowful feeling that just hangs around my neck like an anchor. I pray God peace finds me soon.