Please read.
A co-worker asked me "How are you today?" To which I answered, "Fine, thanks, How are you?" Seems simple enough, right? No. Then she said, "You know, Colleen, you say all the right words, but there's some underlying sad something that I just can't put my finger on." My answer to that was, "Well, my son is dead." She then said"Oh, I'm sorry, did this happen recently?" I told her that it had been a year now. CAN YOU BELIEVE THE BITCH ACTUALLY SAID, "AND YOU HAVEN'T GOTTEN OVER IT YET?" I really wanted to slap the shit out of herbut all I could do was sit there, dumbfounded. I felt sorry for her that she was so stupid. You know, I don't spend as much time here as I used to partly because I am so sick of being the mom of a dead kid. I no longer wish to be this person. All my life I've been a pretty happy sort. Jovial, I've been called. Do people really not get that when your child dies it changes you for EVER AND EVER? Sometimes I pretend that Jeff is still alive just so that I don't have to be so mopey. I hate this. I don't WANT to be this person. God gave me this role to play and I'll do it but if stupid people say stupid things tome I'm no longer going to hold back on them. I'm gonna let them have it. And if I hear one more person tell me that they know how I feel because their dog or their mother in law's nieghbor's uncle died I'm going to puke on them.... Thank you for letting me vent.
Replies
vent away. gotten over it. unbelievable. unbelievable . i guess when it happens to them then they will get it. until then, people should stfu before they make those comments. i met a woman a while back whose son had crossed over, this was before my son, and when she told me that her son had crossed over, i just got up and hugged her, thats all.i think the loneliness is part of this for us, that only other parents who \'get it\' understand, and the people we know , including some family, just want us to push it all away. just know you are not alone here. love, me.
I\'ll punk on her for you. I am sorry you had to hear a stupid hurtful remark. Wow...if I was there someone would be bailing me out today. I am proud you kept youself together. Sorry but I had to let that out. Hope today is better for you. love lucille
I\'m glad you can vent because I need to do that often as well. I\'m so sorry this woman was insensitive. NO, people don\'t get it. Only those who have suffered this devastation. Fortunately I haven\'t encountered many attitudes like the one you did. I find that most people don\'t know what to say and then say nothing and that can be hurtful too. Maybe one day someone more in the limelight will go through this and somehow awaken the general population to this awareness of loss and grief when losing a child. Seems like when someone famous has something happen to them like aids, breast cancer, depression, etc, they almost take on a crusade for their cause. I know that sounds silly but that\'s what usually gets people thinking. Too bad it comes to that. I\'m sorry you had to hear that. I wouldn\'t blame you if you did deck her (lol). Take care. Love Robin
What a stupid hateful thing to say. People have no idea what its like. You are right you are changed forever and ever. I don\'t want to be in this place either but I have no choice. This is our lot in life for now, I believe at some point we will have reconciled their death into our lives and go on, not as who we were but as who we have become. I believe happiness and joy are possible and that we just have to try our best to stay positive and keep moving. You go girl and let people know what its like and how little they actually understand, I\'m with you. Love and hugs Cathy
So insensitive, yet we would never wish for others to have to be where we are today. No one understands except one that has gone through it, that is the lonliness that causes us additional pain. So sorry she hurt you, on top of the immense pain your already feeling. Love and prayers, Lynette ~ Matthews mom
Glad you are able to vent. People do not understand and it is frustrating when there mouth opens and stupid shit comes out. Unfortunately that is how it goes. Truthfully I am glad they don\'t understand cause I don\'t wish this pain on anyone. I used to get more upset and then decided it wasn\'t important enough...
We are here for you and we do understand. Hugs, Inga