Patterns

So we had words this morning when I called home for something and I believed he was clearly drunk. No need to go into this further because it is the same old story and I am tired of the telling, and I already posted in discussions.  I am getting better at the peaceful co- existence, and just need to get to the place where I FULLY give up responsibility for him and my expectations are reasonable. Today was NOT that day.....lol........
five times I called and hung up while waiting for a mature and clear headed response from him! Oh the drama form ME. I calmed down and then called to apologize. Not apologize for what I said or for my emotions or even for my suspicions, but for the loss of control, for the outburst, the drama. And because this promise to minimize the drama is my part of the deal. So even though he IS drinking, I still want to honor my part of the deal.
ANYWAY a few sentences into my apology ( which I wanted to keep short and sweet). He told me I was forgiven even though I made him feel bad. Ok I can accept that I guess, but it did make me smile, Asti always does when he uses these events to move into an alpha dog position. I bet he will be superior and " punish" me when I get home.  I will try not to laugh. Because it is amusing. And everyone can use a moment of hissyfit.