PARENTAL ADVISORY: REVAMPED 2016

 
PREFACE:  TO READ THE SEVERELY TONED DOWN VERSION, GO TO DAILYSTRENGTH.ORG AND LOOK UP THIS JOURNAL ENTRY FOR GZUSthug ON THE DATE BELOW.  BUT IF YOU DON'T...DON'T SAY I DIDN'T WARN YOU.LMFAO.
Journal Entry for June 11, 2007 Monday, June 11, 2007

I WROTE A LITTLE COMEDY ACT DURING A MANIC SPELL ABOUT 10 YEARS AGO.  I WANTED TO BE THE FIRST VULGAR CHRISTIAN COMIDIAN.
I LOVE RACIAL AND SOCIETAL COMIEDIANS LIKE CHRIS ROCK, DAVE CHAPELLE, CARLOS MENCIA, AND THE DOPEST OF ALL TIME, MY NIGGA, KATT WILLIAMS. THIS WAS MY ONLY STAB AT TRYING TO BE RICH AND FAMOUS WHICH I FELL FLAT ON MY FACE, BUT HEY, IT WAS A FUN RIDE.
IT IS A POKE AT LEGALISTIC CHRISTIANITY.
 
 
PSALMS OF A THUG:  COMEDIC INTRO:  TALKIN’ SHIT IN THE NAME OF JESUS:  NOW IS THAT BLASPHEMY, OR WHAT.
AS THE PIONEER CHRISTIAN RAP GROUP, DC TALK FIRST PUT IT IN THE EARLY 90’S, “GOD’S DOIN’ A NEW THING.”  NOW, IN THESE “LAST DAY’S,” IN THIS NEW YEAR OF 2016 THE THING TO ASK IS, “TO CURSE OR NOT TO CURSE” THAT IS THE QUESTION.  FUCK IT, LET’S CURSE.  THE ONLY ONE’S THAT REALLY GET TERRIBLY OFFENDED BY CURSING ARE MOST CHRISTIANS, MOST EMPLOYERS, AND MOST MAIN-STREAM MEDIA OUTLETS, BUT AS FOR THE REST OF US COMMEN FOLK OF THE WORLD, WE’RE ALL FUCKIN' CUSSIN’.  I MEAN, IF YOUR GETTING CUSSED THE FUCK OUT, THAT’S JUST NOT TOLERATED BY ANYONE, BUT IF YOU USE A FEW SWEAR WORDS HERE AND THERE, YOU A) GONNA GET MORE ATTENTION TO WHAT THE FUCK YOU’RE SAYING WHETHER IT IS POSITIVE OR NEGATIVE, AND B) IT ADDS A GREATER EMPHASIS TO THE MOTHAFUCKIN' POINT THAT YOUR TRYING TO MAKE.  YOU SEE WHAT I MEAN?  IF YOU WOULD ALL GET THE FUCK OFF YOUR HIGH-HORSES FOR A MINUTE AND THINK ABOUT IT, YOU KNOW THAT I’M RIGHT.  THINK ABOUT YOUR FAVORITE SONG, OR YOUR FAVORITE COMEDIAN, OR EVAN A FAVORITE MOVIE, CHANCES ARE NOW-A-DAYS THAT THERE’S AT LEAST ONE LINE IN THERE THAT YOU ENJOY WHERE THE ARTIST IS CUSSING WHEN IT IS ABSOLUTELY APPROPRIATE.  YES, IT’S SIN.  SIN IS STILL SIN, AND THERE IS A PAINFUL CONSEQUENCE FOR ALL SIN, AND I WILL NEVER DENY THAT.  (TRUST ME, I KNOW.)  I ALSO FIRMLY BELIEVE THAT THERE WAS A MAN WHO PAID THE PRICE FOR ALL SIN.  HE WAS A MAN WHO WALKED THIS EARTH OVER 2000 YEARS AGO NAMED JESUS CHRIST WHO WAS BORN FROM A VIRGEN, LIVED A SINLESS LIFE, AND LITTERLY GOT THE LIVING SHIT BEAT OUT OF HIM FOR NO REASON EXCEPT FOR BEING SENT BY GOD AND LIVING OUT HIS FATHER’S PURPOSE.  COME ON DAWG, YOU READ THE BOOK, OR AT LEAST SAW “THE PASSION OF THE CHRIST.”  MY HOMEBOY, MY NIGGA, JES…..(HOLD UP, NOW WAIT JUST A DAMN MINUTE.  YOU’RE WHITE.)  OH YEAH DAWG, MY BAD.  LIKE I WAS SAYIN’, MY HOMEBOY, JESUS, DIDN’T CUSS, DIDN’T SMOKE ANY STICKY GREEN SHIT, AND DIDN’T EVEN FUCK ANY PUSSY…..(DAMN,) HE HAD A LITTLE WINE, BUT HE MADE THE SHIT, MAN, YOU GOTTA DRINK THE SHIT YOU MAKE.  ANYWAY, HE LEAD A PERFECT LIFE ACCORDING TO THE LAW OF THE TIME AND DIED BRUTALLY ON THE CROSS, AND THAT WAS AFTER HE HAD TO CARRY THAT BIG OL’ MOTHAFUCKIN' CROSS UP THAT HILL WHILE HE WAS GUSHING OUT BLOOD ACROSS THAT ENTIRE HILL WITH EVERY AGONIZING STEP HE TOOK.  NOW THAT’S SOME GANGSTA SHIT.  BUT GUESS WHAT MY THUG NATION…..(WHAT?)  HE BASICLY GAVE A BIG “FUCK YOU” TO THE PEOPLE THAT KILLED HIM, (NOW IS THAT BLASPHEMOUS OR WHAT) BECAUSE AFTER THREE DAYS OF DEATH, HE SAID “FUCK THIS.  I AIN’T HAVIN’ THIS SHIT NO MORE,” AND ROSE FROM THE DEAD AND ROLLED AWAY THE LARGE STONE AND SAID, “YEAH BABY, THAT’S WHAT I’M TALKIN’ ‘BOUT, I’M UP OUT THIS BITCH.”  I KNOW, I KNOW.  YOU’RE PROBABLY THINKIN’, “OH, THERE HE GOES, AGAIN, MORE FUCKIN' BLASPHEMY.”  COME ON PEOPLE.  THINK ABOUT IT IN TODAY’S WORLD AND CULTURE.  MAKE JESUS REAL IN YOUR EVERY DAY WORLD, AND FOR CHRIST’S SAKE IN EACH ONE OF YOUR HEART’S AND SOUL’S.
 
(IF I WAS DOING THIS ON STAGE, I WOULD STAND IN FRONT OF THE MIC STAND AND USE THE MIC TO NAIL UNSEEN SPIKES INTO EACH WRIST AND DO MY “T.O.(TERRELL OWENS) STAR POSE.” WHILE LOOKING UP TO HEAVEN FOR A MOMENT AND THEN DROP MY HEAD AS IF DEAD FOR 3 SECONDS.  THEN I WOULD POUND MY FIST AGAINST MY HEART 2 TIMES AND POINT TO THE SKY WHILE SAYING, “I LOVE YOU DAD.” AND, “I LOVE YOU JESUS.”  THEN GIVE THE “PEACE SIGN” AND SAY, “YOU SEE THE RABBIT ‘CAUSE I DO.  THAT’S MY DAD YA’LL.  PEACE, AND I’M OUT.  THAT’S MY TIME YA’LL.  THANK YOU AND GOODNIGHT.”  AND THEN DROP THE MIC (OF COURSE) AND WALK THE FUCK OFF.

GZUS THUG.
 
PEACE AND LOVE,
ROB    AND    DEUCE.
 
P.S. MY DAD'S NICKNAME WAS ALWAYS RABBIT.
R.I.P.
12/21/91
 

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