Packing for the move

What a weekend this was.  I'm on a high note right now.  Not too high, just happy about how the weekend went with Jeff and I packing our house up for moving. He came over first thing Sat morning and we jumped right into what needed to be done.  He had the garage and shed and I have the rest of the house.  I'd rather do the whole house than the garage and shed.  The kids are responsible for their rooms so I get the rest. We had a really good day on Saturday.  We joked a lot, we worked very well together to get as much done as possible.  He started out telling me what I needed to look for in a new place and I told him I already found one.  I told him about looking at 7 places to rent and what dumps they were for the money.  Then I told him about the condo I found.  I knew he would balk about the monthly rent, but I made an appointment with the owner for 7pm so he could come and see it.  I knew once he saw it, he would agree that it was a good price and choice and there was no way he could argue that it wasn't a perfect fit for us.  This guy is even allowing me to bring my 2 cats and 130 lb Malamute.  Once he saw it he gave me the impression that we could get it.   I also told Jeff that I'm looking forward to getting out of this house and starting fresh.  He said I don't blame you for feeling that way.  He knows it's been really hard here for me with all the memories and not having him here anymore. After the condo I asked him if he was going to continue packing and he said yes that he would be there until at least dark.  Then I told him I had plans for the night and I would be leaving by 8pm and when we got home I went upstairs and got ready.  I did already have plans but it was good for me to leave him there and let him think about the fact that I didn't want to spend every minute with him while he was around.  (head games, I know, but this is what the experts advise).  Anyway, I went upstairs and got "beautified".  I put on the hottest outfit I have and came back to the garage.  When I walked in he actually gave me the "once over" but I was nonchalant about it and then he told me "you look really nice".  That was a good feeling.  I don't think my husband has actually looked at me, really paid attention, in a very long time. On Sunday he came over early again and I made a point to stay away from him as much as possible.  He started seeking me out to help him with things.  When we took a break to have lunch, he started talking about the condo and how he "couldn't afford it".  I remained calm and gave him the reasons we had to get it.  Kinda left it up in the air for now.  The rest of the day went great.  More joking and a lot of talking.  I didn't bring up our situation at all in both days.  I know he's not ready to start talking about us yet.  I have to be patient and let him come to me, if he ever does.   But there was a hopeful moment in the day that maybe things might work out or maybe I'm just wishful thinking.  I was packing the hall closet coats and things and I took his leather, which he wears all winter long, out to him and asked if he wanted to take it back with him to his mom and dads.  He said, "no, why don't you just pack it with the rest of the coats".  I don't know why but that little sentence gave me a little hope.  If there is anything he still has at our house that he's gonna need in the future months, it's his leather.  So I'm hoping by him leaving it with me at the new condo, he's maybe thinking by winter he'll be back home.  Wishful thinking I know, but a girl can always hope. When we were all done for the day, we sat on the back porch and I brought up the subject of the condo again.  He said once again that he can't afford it and I said, "yes you can, you just can't afford it and a place for yourself too.  That's what you're worried about".  He started preaching how you can't always get what you want and I came back with "you did".  He said, "oh yea, I'm living the high life".  I then said, "you wanted your freedom and you got it.  Just because you're not here doesn't mean the kids and I don't still need your support for now".  He said, "they are old enough (18 & 19) to start supporting themselves" and I said, "not if you want them to continue college they aren't".  I once again, very calmly, told him all the benefits of this condo for us.  By the time I was done, he signed the application.  Hooray !!!!!   The next hurdle is convincing the owner that we can afford it even though we went through a bankruptcy and foreclosure.  This didn't happen because we didn't have the money, it happened because of a realestate venture that turned sour with Michigan's economy.  So I'm hoping after I explain what happened, the owner will rent us this condo.   Now here's the kicker (there always is one) - I'm still not 100% convinced  (maybe 90%) that there isn't someone else in my husbands life.  So I made a point to write down the times he came and left and even when he took the dog for a bath.  On our next phone bill, I'm going to check if any calls were made to this woman from work either right before he came or right after he left.  If he called her, I will know for certain that it's not work related because he was here with me pretty much the whole weekend and there's nothing happening at work that he would need to contact her for.  I'm pray with my whole heart and soul that her number does not show up.  This will be the final proof I need that nothing is going on - however, if her number does show up during these times, I will know for certain that he's cheating and it will be over. So, one day at a time.  Tomorrow I need to see the owner of the condo and convince him that we are qualified to rent from him.  On Tuesday I get my results from by breast biopsy and I pray that everything is OK.  Thursday, Friday, Saturday I'm having a garage sale to get rid of all the unwanted "treasures".  It's amazing what you can accumulate and not use in 10 years.  On Friday my mom comes in from Arizona for a visit.  Didn't know about the moving part when she made her reservations.  That should be interesting.  We'll be moving (hopefully) during the time she's here.  And starting next week, we should be moving (I pray).   I believe in God, I believe in Fate and I believe that everything happens for a reason.  I am praying that this sudden move will be the stepping stone to a better future, with or without my husband.  I'm am looking forward to the next coming weeks.  I just hope once the phone bill comes my dreams aren't shattered.  But I'm preparing myself for the worst so I can be happily surprized with the best. I had a great weekend.  The first one in a very long time.  It didn't change my living situation with my husband, but it's still part of my "master plan" to get him to come home.  We spent practically a whole weekend together and it went really good.  Thank you Lord.