Overwhelming Sad
Dan and I have this... thing. Where we talk about all these things we'd like to do, or have, or make happen... but it's always punctuated with "some day." We've been together 5 years now (consecutively) and it seems those "some days" never come. If there's going to be any income into this union, it has to be me. If there's going to be any success, it has to be me. If I want a home, it'll be my credit. If I want a car, it'll be my credit. If I want a baby... shoot me because it's not the real me.
The longer we're together, the longer the time spent with him out of work, and be applying to every little nook int he wall position I can find only to gather up 100,000 fucking "we regret to inform you" letters. SCREAM. I have a college degree, I graduated with honors, I am a fucking hard worker with determination unmatched but if someone said get a job in a week or I'll paint the wall with your brains... I'd be dead. There apparently aren't any jobs or at least none for me. And None for dan. That's... if he's trying. I dont even know anymore. RAGE RANT SCREAM THROW SHIT .............hide. Fuck this world, fuck this town, fuck my life.
The longer we're together, the longer the time spent with him out of work, and be applying to every little nook int he wall position I can find only to gather up 100,000 fucking "we regret to inform you" letters. SCREAM. I have a college degree, I graduated with honors, I am a fucking hard worker with determination unmatched but if someone said get a job in a week or I'll paint the wall with your brains... I'd be dead. There apparently aren't any jobs or at least none for me. And None for dan. That's... if he's trying. I dont even know anymore. RAGE RANT SCREAM THROW SHIT .............hide. Fuck this world, fuck this town, fuck my life.
Replies
:( I am sorry you are going through such a hard time lately. Finding getting and keeping a job is a job in and of itself it seems I know how you feel and it seriously sucks. Just when I thought I had a good job they might not keep me after March 31st, so I may either resort to temp agencies or go lower in status of a job than I usually do and keep it for a good few years to look good on a resume. Nervous breakdowns have ruined my life, because I couldn\'t keep the good job that I wanted. About the best luck I have had so far is with a internet site called Indeed.com they allow you too look for jobs according to your zip code or degree or job type.
They also have a really good resume builder
I\'m on nearly every job site known to humankind. indeed is my go to. monster second
I have been in your circumstance so many times in my life I don\'t even want to start counting. The one thing that always kept me going is the fact that I know nothing is really forever set in stone on this earth. When I had my very last hope that things could get better, they always did. Somehow a miracle would come along and would change everything. Boom! Out of the blue!
It was never expected. It just happened. A miracle in my eyes would come along and knock out every imaginary horrible outcome I could think of or dream of would be gone. Poof!
And suddenly, things would start going my way. A job application I filled out 4 months before finally moved to the top of the stack, and I got the job. An IRS refund I was not even expecting came in the mail so I could pay my utility bills and get my electricity, gas, and water turned back on. A mechanic down the street said he would fix my car for free; I didn\'t even have to pay for the part! Little Miracles...
Lift your head up high, and stare at the stars because they are tiny lights that shine down on us, but they are massive in reality. Pray and ask for God\'s help and He will hear you. You are both in my thoughts and prayers, and I will put you on the prayer list at my church.
Don\'t give up hope! NEVER GIVE UP HOPE! Believe that miracles can and still do happen. Little blessings do come along. I know they do.
May God bless you both and keep you in His loving arms from now and throughout eternity.
Your friend,
Karen
Thank you so much km. I really appreciate that. I try to keep my head up, and try to keep myself going, but it isn\'t always easy. You know?