Out of Sorts
I didn't write yesterday. A lot happened. It didn't slip my mind to write, and I wasn't too busy...I just...didn't write. My niece and nephew spent the day and night last night, so there were the usual things there. I haven't been feeling that great and neither has my mom, which worries me. I was going through the process of enrollment at yet another online college yesterday, only to hit another roadblock. I do not even know what I should do anymore. I am tired of putting off school, but the one school that I could start at anytime is being extremely difficult, thanks to the enrollment advisor who was assigned to my file. He is infuriating.
Anyway, on the plus side, I found out the Sheriff's Department in my county is holding their first annual 5k race for charity on the 3rd of November. I have never participated in a 5k before. Neither has my husband, but he agreed it would be a great way to start getting in shape. I know that I can walk that distance no problem, but I want to be able to at least lightly jog it. So, we will be starting to train for that in the coming weeks.
November 3rd also marks the 8th year anniversary of my two year old niece's death. I am hoping that doing something so positive on that day will help create good memories and get my mind off of depressing things. I miss her so much every day, but I know she is with God and is smiling down on us all. I want to make her proud. I want to be the Aunt she loved so much.
On a not so positive note, I was hit with the insomnia bug again last night and not even Sleepy Time tea was able to help me get some Z's. I finally fell asleep around 5 am. Which means I slept until 3pm today.
Today is not going well at all. I don't feel well, my mom doesn't feel well and she is mad at me. There was a misunderstanding this morning and she is upset over it. It hurts my feelings when she is upset with me because she is my world. I worry about her and I cannot be without her.
I wish my husband and I could afford to get out of the house when he gets home in 30 minutes. I really just think I need a break from everything. There is always something happening, something for me to stress over. I need a night where I don't have to think about any of it. But, we have no money and do not live in an area where there is any kind of "free" night life.
So, I dunno what I am going to do about all of this and this whole entry is a bungled mess, but as the title says, I am out of sorts.
Anyway, on the plus side, I found out the Sheriff's Department in my county is holding their first annual 5k race for charity on the 3rd of November. I have never participated in a 5k before. Neither has my husband, but he agreed it would be a great way to start getting in shape. I know that I can walk that distance no problem, but I want to be able to at least lightly jog it. So, we will be starting to train for that in the coming weeks.
November 3rd also marks the 8th year anniversary of my two year old niece's death. I am hoping that doing something so positive on that day will help create good memories and get my mind off of depressing things. I miss her so much every day, but I know she is with God and is smiling down on us all. I want to make her proud. I want to be the Aunt she loved so much.
On a not so positive note, I was hit with the insomnia bug again last night and not even Sleepy Time tea was able to help me get some Z's. I finally fell asleep around 5 am. Which means I slept until 3pm today.
Today is not going well at all. I don't feel well, my mom doesn't feel well and she is mad at me. There was a misunderstanding this morning and she is upset over it. It hurts my feelings when she is upset with me because she is my world. I worry about her and I cannot be without her.
I wish my husband and I could afford to get out of the house when he gets home in 30 minutes. I really just think I need a break from everything. There is always something happening, something for me to stress over. I need a night where I don't have to think about any of it. But, we have no money and do not live in an area where there is any kind of "free" night life.
So, I dunno what I am going to do about all of this and this whole entry is a bungled mess, but as the title says, I am out of sorts.
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