Onward, Upward, Forward
Well, finally here I am.
To say life has been interesting is putting it mildly I guess. I almost don't know where to begin or what to say.
I'm trying to stay disciplined in taking positive baby steps forward only each & every day. I'm staying very in tune with my body & soul & listening to it as carefully as I can. I'm learning when it needs me to back off, stop, etc. etc.
The C-Diff bacterial colitis thing is a closed door behind me but I've got to say honestly that man did that throw me for a major loop & scare. I saw my rheumy this past Tues. We had talked abt me going back on Methotrexate after the C-Diff was safely behind me & those meds were done & my system had a chance to regroup. I'm back on the weekly methotrexate injection. There truly is progress in this area as far as the lupus is concerned. He's also going to slowly start reducing the prednisone dosage over the next month too & that I'm major pleased abt.
A huge huge issue here is that thru soul searching, prayer time with the Lord, quiet reflection & meditation I've now finally come to terms with the lupus meds in whatever version or type they have to be in my life. I now can see that all the times before now there was too large a part of me that stayed at war with the whole thing. I could not accept that there are those meds & such that have to be a part of who I am, at least right now.
The hardest thing for me to remember to control & reshape is now I generally live my daily life. Things have to stay hugely different fr before. I now see that I always need to establish much stricter control & can no longer be trying to fly off in all directions, do this, do that, go here, go there, etc. etc. I'm throwing that treadmill away. BUT, part of my days will sure as heck still include my once a week yoga class & in fall my once a week Zumba dance class. My dr does agree that these things can play a major part in overall wellness. Got to keep those muscles & bones strong which helps against physical pain issues.
Got to work on putting some weight back on though. When I was in the hospital I really puffed up somehow & one day when they weighed me I was 150. Now all of a sudden I'm abt 128. Hello, can't figure out how the heck this happened. I need to be at abt at least 135 to 137. Most people can tell that I look a bit too gaunt somehow. Is this the price I pay for loving my veggies & fruits too much maybe LOL. The way I see it though is I'm keeping my eating abt 85% healthy (I mean hey got to indulge a bit right, a little ice cream now & then, a piece of candy or whatever). I think as long as I can feel that my body feels balanced then all is proceeding well.
Well I'll sign off for now. I so do appreciate all my dear dear friends who take the time to check this out. I doubt if you'll ever really realize how vital a part of my life you all are.
To say life has been interesting is putting it mildly I guess. I almost don't know where to begin or what to say.
I'm trying to stay disciplined in taking positive baby steps forward only each & every day. I'm staying very in tune with my body & soul & listening to it as carefully as I can. I'm learning when it needs me to back off, stop, etc. etc.
The C-Diff bacterial colitis thing is a closed door behind me but I've got to say honestly that man did that throw me for a major loop & scare. I saw my rheumy this past Tues. We had talked abt me going back on Methotrexate after the C-Diff was safely behind me & those meds were done & my system had a chance to regroup. I'm back on the weekly methotrexate injection. There truly is progress in this area as far as the lupus is concerned. He's also going to slowly start reducing the prednisone dosage over the next month too & that I'm major pleased abt.
A huge huge issue here is that thru soul searching, prayer time with the Lord, quiet reflection & meditation I've now finally come to terms with the lupus meds in whatever version or type they have to be in my life. I now can see that all the times before now there was too large a part of me that stayed at war with the whole thing. I could not accept that there are those meds & such that have to be a part of who I am, at least right now.
The hardest thing for me to remember to control & reshape is now I generally live my daily life. Things have to stay hugely different fr before. I now see that I always need to establish much stricter control & can no longer be trying to fly off in all directions, do this, do that, go here, go there, etc. etc. I'm throwing that treadmill away. BUT, part of my days will sure as heck still include my once a week yoga class & in fall my once a week Zumba dance class. My dr does agree that these things can play a major part in overall wellness. Got to keep those muscles & bones strong which helps against physical pain issues.
Got to work on putting some weight back on though. When I was in the hospital I really puffed up somehow & one day when they weighed me I was 150. Now all of a sudden I'm abt 128. Hello, can't figure out how the heck this happened. I need to be at abt at least 135 to 137. Most people can tell that I look a bit too gaunt somehow. Is this the price I pay for loving my veggies & fruits too much maybe LOL. The way I see it though is I'm keeping my eating abt 85% healthy (I mean hey got to indulge a bit right, a little ice cream now & then, a piece of candy or whatever). I think as long as I can feel that my body feels balanced then all is proceeding well.
Well I'll sign off for now. I so do appreciate all my dear dear friends who take the time to check this out. I doubt if you'll ever really realize how vital a part of my life you all are.
Replies
So glad to hear about your progress with the lupus . I\'m glad to hear that you have some peace about things that you were at war with before. I think the weight thing was just fluids they gave you, don\'t you? Plus fighting the things you have takes bodily energy, so all of your fuel probably went for that, leading to weight loss ... maybe????
Yes, we all need a bit of wiggle room in our diet ... my acupuncturists all said to only strive for about 80% as the ideal because 100% is almost impossible to maintain anyway and who really wants to live like that for very long?
I\'m happy you are keeping your you and zumba! good for you! I\'m happy to see a journal and know how you are doing. I pray for you and hope it is making a difference. lots of love and hugs, m
Actually mechelle you bring up some very valid points because for several days at the beginning of my stay I did have IV fluids continuously because the c-diff really drains so much fr you. Oh wise woman you. I\'m so with you on the wiggle room diet wise. Sure helps to keep you fr being dissappointed right.
Nothing wrong with loving veggies. I am so grateful you are feeling better.
I do that thing with medicine, pain meds mostly. I hate taking them but they do make my life \'doable\' sometimes.
Same with daughter, she quits taking her meds for bi-polar because she feels great and doesn\'t need them, thing is they (meds) are why she is feeling better.
Anyho...I agree with Mechelle too, I need more wiggle than diet though. I always find excuses not to exercise :p when it helps so much. I am just plain lazy.
Love to you always and so glad you are back swinging!
I so admire how you have been so reflective, soul searching and have found some answers and I sense some relief, yes? So proud of you and how you\'re managing your illness and doing what\'s best for YOU, including yoga and zumba! Love and hugs....kinda mad at me for getting here late... puh... xxoo
I just love your journals. I am happy your doing better. I also need to lose weight. They have me back on that predizone and its a fat medicine.. LOL Anyways may God continue to bless you. Love you forever, Frieda