Onward

Yesterday found me all over the psychic map with my thoughts and emotions. I contracted another night at the motel in hopes of settling those vascillations before I attempt to move forward. I spent most of the day in bed, lost in sorrow, attempting to let it process at the sensory level without the limitations of words. This morning finds me feeling clear and ready to proceed. So far, at least. The day is still young.

The feeling that the wandering portion of this sojourn is over has continued to gain strength. I don't know if I really believe the homebody I have loved for 37 years will ever spend a substantial length of time outside the State of Texas, but he is humoring me on the potential of expanding the family holdings outside the State. The current thought is for me to find a short term rental in that soupy, four-state region where uncounted rivers come together in the heart of North America for a more detailed survey of the available potentials. I've been surfing the internet for possibilities, but remain unable to trust the "site unseen" aspect of internet exchanges. I've set up enough web sites to believe what I see on the internet without some real time confirmations. Even when the players behind the web site are honest, the world is a much bigger monitor. Accurate digital representations of the big, bad world are difficult, at best.

We see what grows.