One week and one day evening
I went to work and was out by 1000 and off to the coast by 1130. It was a beautiful day. Had steamer clams with garlic butter. Delicious. I took my younger dog with me and we are both completely tired. I'm already ready for bed. I didn't formerly exercise today, but I walked a lot on the beach. I struggled again with drinking enough water. Yesterday I did great.
Liquor stores easily passed by. The last one coming back from the coast I did watch as I passed it by, but did not turn around.
I listened to my tonglen tape on my way to work, and one of the things I thought again in terms of how to handle my desire to stop at the liquor store. When I feel that desire to stop, I can say other people feel this too...other people struggle with this, too. The idea behind it is to make the thought/struggle less internalized, less magnified, less a thought or struggle you are alone with.
That's the most basic way of handling it. Once you do that...if it feels genuine, you can say to yourself may we all be free from these thoughts, this struggle. After that the most advanced would be to say May I feel these thoughts and struggle so that others may not have to.
I didn't do the second and the third, but on my way to the coast and back when those liquor store thoughts came up...I immediately thought to myself, other people struggle with this, too. It did feel different...like it popped me out of my own head and made me think broader...my thoughts less small and more expansive.
I'll keep playing with it. I can see using it when I feel frustrated or just about anything where there is a struggle and my most immediate struggle is drinking. Many people struggle with this. I am not alone.
Soon it will be 8 days. You need to come up with a water plan for work. You like ice water. Buy a wide mouth water bottle or check your hiking gear. And also buy a couple ice trays for the freezer at work. So same plan: water, eat, breath, exercise/stretch. Continue to think on an extra little something you could do. Actually going to the coast today counts because normally you would be afraid to be away from your alcohol all day into the evening. How many times have you said no to something from a friend because you didn't think you'd be home at the time that you probably felt you needed to drink or you just plain didn't want your two free drinking days interrupted? Again this is a change. It's different. It's good.
This will remain your biggest goal for awhile. Do not go to the liquor store. Go home along the river. Take the highway not the back road and go straight home. You have groceries and everything you need for the week. Just stick to your plan for now. All is good. I do not drink. I am making a life change. This is a change I must make. It is not for today or tomorrow or until I get bored with it. It is a life change. I am committed.
Liquor stores easily passed by. The last one coming back from the coast I did watch as I passed it by, but did not turn around.
I listened to my tonglen tape on my way to work, and one of the things I thought again in terms of how to handle my desire to stop at the liquor store. When I feel that desire to stop, I can say other people feel this too...other people struggle with this, too. The idea behind it is to make the thought/struggle less internalized, less magnified, less a thought or struggle you are alone with.
That's the most basic way of handling it. Once you do that...if it feels genuine, you can say to yourself may we all be free from these thoughts, this struggle. After that the most advanced would be to say May I feel these thoughts and struggle so that others may not have to.
I didn't do the second and the third, but on my way to the coast and back when those liquor store thoughts came up...I immediately thought to myself, other people struggle with this, too. It did feel different...like it popped me out of my own head and made me think broader...my thoughts less small and more expansive.
I'll keep playing with it. I can see using it when I feel frustrated or just about anything where there is a struggle and my most immediate struggle is drinking. Many people struggle with this. I am not alone.
Soon it will be 8 days. You need to come up with a water plan for work. You like ice water. Buy a wide mouth water bottle or check your hiking gear. And also buy a couple ice trays for the freezer at work. So same plan: water, eat, breath, exercise/stretch. Continue to think on an extra little something you could do. Actually going to the coast today counts because normally you would be afraid to be away from your alcohol all day into the evening. How many times have you said no to something from a friend because you didn't think you'd be home at the time that you probably felt you needed to drink or you just plain didn't want your two free drinking days interrupted? Again this is a change. It's different. It's good.
This will remain your biggest goal for awhile. Do not go to the liquor store. Go home along the river. Take the highway not the back road and go straight home. You have groceries and everything you need for the week. Just stick to your plan for now. All is good. I do not drink. I am making a life change. This is a change I must make. It is not for today or tomorrow or until I get bored with it. It is a life change. I am committed.
Replies