One of these days
Got a call from US Consulate in Hong Kong, asking to register her death in order to prepare a death certificate. I got that from HK government. Apparently, for the paperwork in the US, I need one issued by the US government. I have been holding up well for the past few days at work. I still grieved and am feeling sad all the time. But I was able to set my time for grief and even push back tears a few times. However, strong emotions came once the Consul came out saying to me "my deepest condolence....". I held my face with my hands, as if I was trying to hide my face to stop the tears..."No, no, don't let go now, later" as I telling myself not to cry, at this occasion. But I couldn't do that. Sometimes, you just couldn't stop crying as you want. You just couldn't....Baby, I miss you so much. I am trying to be strong as I promised you....and I think I have been strong and I am so so proud for that....but I want to hear you say that I am proud of you....I want to hear it from you....so so much.
This writing from wifeless does reflect my experiences. Posted here so I can trace it
http://www.onefitwidow.com/unique-and-devastating-loss/
This writing from wifeless does reflect my experiences. Posted here so I can trace it
http://www.onefitwidow.com/unique-and-devastating-loss/
Replies
adding more hugs and wishes of peace for you ....
You are being very strong and I am sure that she is proud of you. Don\'t equate crying with weakness. Not the same thing at all.
Tiger . . better to cry than not to cry. Remember these are healing tears. I am so sorry you are having to deal with Consulate red tape on top of grief. You are strong and she would be proud. Hugs, D
Let the tears flow. It is a release and part of the healing. So many of us made promises to our spouses that we would be okay. You will be.....in time.
Aloha, Lori
Thanks you all for comments. I am feeling much better now. The tears are cleansing some sadness away
So sad you had to go through the certificate thing twice. It\'s OK to cry in those situations, I mean, it\'s always OK to cry, but I\'m sure they understand in that situation.
I come across the envelope with my wife\'s Death Certificates, with her full name printed neatly in it. Always gives me chills.
I got a notice of a certified letter sent to her - probably from the hospital, where she left a $562,000 bill, she was uninsured. At first I thought of going to the post office with the death certificate. Then I said, Fuck That, they are sending mail to a dead person.
I need to apply for Charity Care at the hospital by July. They said that might cover enough for them to write the rest off. I doubt that they will give it if they check my income. I may have to declare bankruptcy. Oh well. They have not yet come after me for the bill, and that was another reason I did not pick up the letter, to stall that transfer.