One Month (almost) down
It's been almost one month since that last hug. I clinged on to him so tightly, I didn't want to let go. And then within a blink of an eye, I was alone. At least for the next two years.
I met him when I was 26 at work. I had never been the type to chase a guy and to be honest, hadn't even had a boyfriend since freshman year of high school. And that one was just for three weeks. But the second I met him, i couldn't help myself. I dressed up and out way more effort into my appearance than I ever had and told everyone I knew about this cute guy with glasses. For a month I kept dropping hints, invited him to group outings, etc just to get him to hang out with me outside of the workplace. Finally I got him to come over to my house to watch a tv show I was obsessed with at the time but he had never seen. The whole time I wanted for him to hold my hand or make any kind of move. I even walked him out to his car. But nothing. Then on the next day after repeated sighs about how I wanted to go to so and so's party but I hated going by myself since I won't know anyone beside the host, he finally said that he could take me. He later said it took so long for him to ask because he closed and wouldn't get out of work till after 11 pm. On the way home from the party, I flat out told him that he would want to walk me to the door, which he did. And then we kissed. Our first kiss of thousands.
We've never been apart longer than two nights since we first started dating 4 years ago. I practically moved in with him by the end of the first month. While I still had my own place I spent every night with him. I just knew from the start that he was who I was supposed to be with. Four whole years prior to meeting him, I had written a short story based on the adventures I had one night at a bar in college with my friends. In it I had written my list of the perfect man and had changed the name of the hero/love interest of the evening. The name I choose for him is the name of my husband and he fits every criteria on that list. I had completely forgotten about the story until I ran across it a few days ago. It just makes me more sure that I am supposed to be with him. He is the only guy I've ever done more than kiss with, he is my first and my last. And now he is so far away from me. It still feels like he's just at work and that at any moment he will walk in the door ready to play with his daughter. And the disappointment of going to bed alone every night kills me. January 2016 is what the site says is his release. I don't know if there will be time off for good behavior. I do know that because he isn't an alcoholic or a drug addict there aren't any classes for him to take to get more time off. Which is dumb. He's not too bad of a guy with no problems related to dependency so we can't offer him anything to help remove some of his time.
Our prison system is so screwed up. We have such a small portion of the worlds population but a big portion of it's prisoners. Something must be wrong. Either Americans are really bad people in general or we just throw everyone in prison. And the fact that the idea of it rehabilitating any of the prisoners is a joke. My husband is in a prison for the next two years that doesn't offer any classes or programs. He just gets to read books and work in the kitchen.
I don't know how I will ever make it through this. They say take it one day at a time, but when I do, all I see is the enormous amount of one days I will have to go through till I am in his arms again.
I met him when I was 26 at work. I had never been the type to chase a guy and to be honest, hadn't even had a boyfriend since freshman year of high school. And that one was just for three weeks. But the second I met him, i couldn't help myself. I dressed up and out way more effort into my appearance than I ever had and told everyone I knew about this cute guy with glasses. For a month I kept dropping hints, invited him to group outings, etc just to get him to hang out with me outside of the workplace. Finally I got him to come over to my house to watch a tv show I was obsessed with at the time but he had never seen. The whole time I wanted for him to hold my hand or make any kind of move. I even walked him out to his car. But nothing. Then on the next day after repeated sighs about how I wanted to go to so and so's party but I hated going by myself since I won't know anyone beside the host, he finally said that he could take me. He later said it took so long for him to ask because he closed and wouldn't get out of work till after 11 pm. On the way home from the party, I flat out told him that he would want to walk me to the door, which he did. And then we kissed. Our first kiss of thousands.
We've never been apart longer than two nights since we first started dating 4 years ago. I practically moved in with him by the end of the first month. While I still had my own place I spent every night with him. I just knew from the start that he was who I was supposed to be with. Four whole years prior to meeting him, I had written a short story based on the adventures I had one night at a bar in college with my friends. In it I had written my list of the perfect man and had changed the name of the hero/love interest of the evening. The name I choose for him is the name of my husband and he fits every criteria on that list. I had completely forgotten about the story until I ran across it a few days ago. It just makes me more sure that I am supposed to be with him. He is the only guy I've ever done more than kiss with, he is my first and my last. And now he is so far away from me. It still feels like he's just at work and that at any moment he will walk in the door ready to play with his daughter. And the disappointment of going to bed alone every night kills me. January 2016 is what the site says is his release. I don't know if there will be time off for good behavior. I do know that because he isn't an alcoholic or a drug addict there aren't any classes for him to take to get more time off. Which is dumb. He's not too bad of a guy with no problems related to dependency so we can't offer him anything to help remove some of his time.
Our prison system is so screwed up. We have such a small portion of the worlds population but a big portion of it's prisoners. Something must be wrong. Either Americans are really bad people in general or we just throw everyone in prison. And the fact that the idea of it rehabilitating any of the prisoners is a joke. My husband is in a prison for the next two years that doesn't offer any classes or programs. He just gets to read books and work in the kitchen.
I don't know how I will ever make it through this. They say take it one day at a time, but when I do, all I see is the enormous amount of one days I will have to go through till I am in his arms again.
Replies