One Day at a Time - too true

9.20.11
Yesterday was my third day of sobriety. Last night I was looking up 'men's underwear' for info on a film scene I was writing. I wanted to know if I should write 'men's underwear' or 'men's briefs''. So I googled 'men's underwear'. I came across a sexually provocative retail web site for men's underwear. The underwear was sexual, the men were wearing see-through clothing. Very stimulating. And I'm not gay. But it woke up the beast. And it started me thinking about a phone call to the online service. And I went to my phone service web site. To check into making a call. And... I blocked the site a couple days ago. I took care of me. Anticipating. I hid the bottles of booze. I could have unblocked the site. Pretty easy to do. Didn't do it. Left it blocked. The impulse passed. I went on with the night. No compulsive masturbation. A metamorphisis has begun. I can feel it. I am breaking with past behavior. I am breaking free. My one uncontrollable urge, my uncontrollable addiction. Came face to face with it last night. Moved on from it. Yes!