On being alone

I've learned something about myself:  I hate being alone, especially on Friday, Saturday, and Sunday.  This epiphany happened because yesterday at work, there were no customers. Doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out that this could lead to the dreaded pink slip.  So, I thought about what would happen to me if I lost my job.  Fear overtook me, but looking back, I was surprised that finances were the second thing I feared.  The first, being alone. 
You see, I work in retail which means weekend work.  Not every Sunday, but every other Sunday.  And some requested Sundays.  I work most Fridays and every Saturday.  I've come to rely on the comfort my coworkers provide--non-stop talk, a place to socialize.  So if I lost my job, I'd lose that.  I'd end up sitting at home by myself.  A terrible thought.
When DH was here, it wasn't much different.  He worked all the time, and I shopped all the time.  I was rarely home.  Now, I know why.  Being out, meant not being alone.  So now to fix it.  I believe in confronting my fears:  I have a fear of flying so I travel out of the country.  I had a fear of dogs, so I bought one.  So today, I'm staying home.  I'm not going to run to work, or to my father.  I'm staying home which means no shopping, no television, no anything that will take me out of here. I'm midway through the day now, and I've discovered something else about myself:  all my debt is due to this problem.
What a shock.  The money I could have saved had I known this sooner.