Old Friends

A few months ago an old friend got in touch with me via another website. She's not just any old friend, she was my best friend for years, she's godmother to my son and shared a lot of things in my life with me. 5 years ago we had a stupid argument and fell out. We were both too stubborn to contact the other etc, and when I did try and contact her she didn't answer the phone so I assumed she didn't want to speak to me. It turns out that all these years she's wanted to get in touch with me and share her life with me. I've missed her so much, I didn't realise how much until we chatted on msn for hours about all the old times, the things we did as teenagers, about the birth of my son, boyfriends, going out to nightclubs, throwing up after too much after shock, you name it we did it! Now all is going really well, she regrets missing out on 5 years of my sons life and I'd love her to be part of it. My only problem is now I've admitted to myself that I have bipolar and am suffering now in a way I never did, will she treat me differently? Will she be like omg I don't remember you like this? Actually, it's not my only problem. Since we've gone our seperate ways she has done really well for herself, she has her own business, a massive house, car and has just got married. She's boasted about how much money they make, but not in a look at me way,more of a look how well I've done for myself type of thing. What have I done in those 5 years? Well I suppose I've done some big things, I've beaten cancer. I finished my college course. I got into uni. I dropped out of uni. Went back to uni. Became disabled to the point of needing a wheelchair.  When you weigh it up I've done nothing compared to her. What if she see's me as some sort of failure? What if she thinks I've not done the right thing by my son - her godson? She's asked us to go over visit possibly at the weekend. It's about an hours drive from where I live and would be great to see her again, but the way I'm feeling now I don't know how I'll react. The past few days I've gone from verging on hypomanic to so much emotion I just burst into tears.  I know I'll cry when I see her. I know I'll want to hug her. What if she doesn't feel the same? Is it just my paranoia? I mean would she have invited me over just to brag? Im starting to question my own judgement. I've been awake for 38 hours now, my judgement may be slightly impaired.  Do I tell her how I feel or just go with the flow and see what happens? Will I make a fool of myself if I tell her these things?