okay, okay, I'd like some ketchup with my crow please..
So here's the deal, I went to my neuro this morning to review the results of mri. 25 leisons, not 7. Whatever! I did learn something, and I didn't cry either it was awesome. I feel anxious when I go see him and the clinical/personal/professional realtionship is just akward. I have complained about him quite a bit and enough that I am even tired of hearing it, soooo..... guess the problem lies within me, I'm the one with the problem, not him!
I believe I have been looking for a kind of communication with the doc like what I have with other people. I believe I'm a pretty fair listener and asume that other people listen like me. -wrong- guess I'm being self-centered litterally and spending too much time in my own belly button looking at myself -yikes- He isn't a counselor, his job is medicine!!!! duh!!!! he talks about ms and symptoms, medication clinical stuff. I wanted him to hear me like a human. Silly me!!!!! He is very smart as far as disease stuff but he doesn't get the emotional part. He wants to separate the disease from the feelings I have around it which I understand. The problem is, I have symptoms of depression that kick my ass and ms sure doesnt help, the two are connected, he looks at them at separate problems. WOW talk about compartmentalizing - Anyways, rant rave, ramble. On top of it all, he is a man and I have a "problem" he wants to fix it, I just want him to listen!!!!!!! I have been going to him and expecting/hoping he would listen. It's not his job. Kind of like me taking my broken car radio to an engine mechanic. Wrong department!!!!! SOOOO here it is, I will stick with my female general practitiner as she is in the same clinic and only see neuro if I HAVE to! I see a counselor/therapist and I'm finally getting to the business of dealing with my stuff too. so all is well, neuro can just rock on and be as technical as he can, it takes people with those kind ofn smarts to do the research and stuff like that.
I believe I have been looking for a kind of communication with the doc like what I have with other people. I believe I'm a pretty fair listener and asume that other people listen like me. -wrong- guess I'm being self-centered litterally and spending too much time in my own belly button looking at myself -yikes- He isn't a counselor, his job is medicine!!!! duh!!!! he talks about ms and symptoms, medication clinical stuff. I wanted him to hear me like a human. Silly me!!!!! He is very smart as far as disease stuff but he doesn't get the emotional part. He wants to separate the disease from the feelings I have around it which I understand. The problem is, I have symptoms of depression that kick my ass and ms sure doesnt help, the two are connected, he looks at them at separate problems. WOW talk about compartmentalizing - Anyways, rant rave, ramble. On top of it all, he is a man and I have a "problem" he wants to fix it, I just want him to listen!!!!!!! I have been going to him and expecting/hoping he would listen. It's not his job. Kind of like me taking my broken car radio to an engine mechanic. Wrong department!!!!! SOOOO here it is, I will stick with my female general practitiner as she is in the same clinic and only see neuro if I HAVE to! I see a counselor/therapist and I'm finally getting to the business of dealing with my stuff too. so all is well, neuro can just rock on and be as technical as he can, it takes people with those kind ofn smarts to do the research and stuff like that.
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