Oh my........

I am 13 dpo and I am not feeling any different than normal. I still don't know when I will test- not sure what day I will be prepared for the potential BFN.  On Wednesday two co-workers are announcing their baby news... one is my good friend, the other's wife is preggo and his kids will be 18 months apart. HA- I could've had two by now!!!!!!!!!!!!!  So, maybe it will be best for me to wait until after Wed, so I don't break down at the meeting- what an embarrassement. It's already a bit akward for me, since I have confided in several people whom I am close to at work. I actually had a little break down last Friday while eating lunch with a friend. Today, she brought me in a painted rock that reads "BELIEVE."  I thought that was so kind and touching. I am really lucky to have such caring friends, co-workers (mostly), and family.  My DH also sent me the sweetest message today- I know we will get through this........ I still wish I had a "map."  I also have no idea what the plan is next cycle............. trying not to dwell, staying calm for the sake of everyone around me & myself of course!  I need a magic wand or something...........