Oh boy ...

Well today my boss actually spoke to me and told me they have found a replacement. It only happened after I gave them a date when I would leave. I will meet with her tomorrow. This is not how I wanted to end a 37 year career but I think it is best for me, the kids, the school. I will miss the kids a lot. So then on the way home I strayed just a teensy bit out of my lane and sideswiped a man in his work car. Thank goodness he was very kind and nice and we settled on the spot. I know you're not supposed to that but I have so much paper work to do with J's death I can't face any more. If he turns out to be a liar, well, then I guess he does. I hardly slept last night and can't do more than I'm doing right now. I lost my camera at a granddaughter's school play the other day and left one of J's books where one of my liveliest dogs was able to shred it. The point is, I'm tired and stressed. I seldom have any driving problems other than getting lost and seldom lose anything. It is brain fog and I couldn't do a good job at work which makes me feel horrible. I am just going to stay home for a while and take care of myself. I need to regroup. Plus it's beginning to look a lot like Christmas in my part of the world. The snow is falling  ...AGAIN!
I have to remind myself at times that not all my negative feelings are due to J's death. I had bad days when he was alive too. He just had a way of warming my heart and making me laugh a lot of times. Now I go to DS for comfort and to  my friends.  I am grateful today for:
if I had to hit someone, at least he was nice and driving his old car
they found a replacement for me
I can get another camera. 
I am in a warm house as the snow flies.
A friend called with an invitation for tomorrow night
I made a good rice, veggie and cheese cassarole tonight and had a tangerine.
my dogs are great.
I don't have to whip the world tonight
 I often feel my darling's presense; I know he well and happy
I have great memories
I'm going to bed early with a book.