Nowhere Safe

Christmas has come and almost gone, but what would normally be a good day - good food, great laughs seems to have been such a horrid day for me. Lately, over the past few weeks me and food seem to have such a falling out. Food was my last bastion of self esteem and happiness, but these days I get so anxious I'm lucky if I can keep anything down. I mean, I used to love spicy food but last time I tried a curry - it all came back up into a waiting toilet basin. Heck, I was made a full English fry up for breakfast but I think i managed a little bacon - a couple of beans before coughing up almost half of what I'd eaten. I left a plate full of food, heck - when I think about eating I get so anxious I just want to... I just want to sleep and never wake up. I used to love my food, food was the hug I rarely ever get - food was my friend. Now I don't even have that - and all hope seems to have left me. Sorry... I didn't know where else I could go... heck, the docs have put me on anti-psychotics to help reduce my anxiety - it's only been 2 weeks so not expecting anything quite yet... :'(