nothing yet

I still have heard nothing from Cleveland Clinic-it will be a week tomorrow since I called.  IU is the only one who called back, but I haven't been home when they call and they are closed so I can't call them back----oh the endless cycle and joy of chronic pancreatitis!!!!  If CC doesn't call or contact by tomorrow morning, I will make a conscious effort to reach Dr. Sherman at IU and go there instead of CC...even though it's 8 very long hours away...  I am crappy sick again today for some reason,nauseated as hell-I didn't eat anything bad, in fact I didn't eat anything at all!!! I puked at 4am and then again at about 11am.. I don't know what's going on...I've been really,really good about my diet. It can't be my patch because I'm on the same strength as before..I don't think it's my patch, anyway.  I'm out of phenagren, but will literally roll over in my grave before I call Dr. Goswami for any!!!! seems like anytime I call him for Phen, he's like "go to the ER" or some other such stupidity. I wonder if he gets a kickback from my er visits? I would think not, but I don't always know... I'm no closer to my goal of being well for little girl's wedding next July...I've missed so much...Christmas,Easter,everyone's b-day's...and I will NOT MISS MANDY'S WEDDING OR RUIN IT FOR HER BY BEING SICK!!!!   I will be there,right by her side-in my strapless mocha bubble dress and both of my arms will be the same size, even I must have lipo(!) if I keep continuing to be sick until July, I should be pretty skinny by then. But I really don't care if I'm skinny or not- I care about walking down aisle right in front of my little girl on the biggest day of her life! and I care about all the focus being on Mandy, not me. I don't want anyone whispering about how bad I look or how sick I must be. I want only to hear about how beautiful Mandy is in her gorgeous dress and how lucky Matt is to be marrying such a wonderful girl.