Not the best day

So we've been taking a break for a couple of months and now I am starting the panicing again. The what if's ....and its already upsetting me. I just don't know what to do. I've lost 13 lbs. and feel great but I still can't stay pregnant. I am so lost right now. I really do want to be a Mother. I am not against adoption or other methods of having a baby. And my fear is that if we just keep trying we will miss the boat and never have a child. I just really don't know when to say enough is enough...I mean it's hard to stop when you are getting pregnant. I just wish I knew the reason that I can't stay preganat so that I could fix it.

Replies

Courage2010
Courage2010

I\'m so sorry to hear that you are having those feelings... I often wonder when I\'m going to finally get the chance to be a mother, too. I just hate the days when I feel like it\'s crashing down and me and everyone around me cannot even begin to relate...

I read your other posting and you had said you lose your pregnancies early. My friend couldn\'t stay pregnant either, however, she always lost the baby around 12 weeks. She went in for testing and her uterus was shaped incorrectly. She ended up having surgery and now she\'s fine. I know you and her have different problems, but have you had a HSG??? Have they checked that with you??? Any other testing???
kellbell3150
kellbell3150

Yeah I had that HSG done about 2 months ago and it was fine. I have done the HCG twice and lupus testing 3 times. Everything is normal. The lupus was a faint positive one out of 3 times. But everything with me and my husband is normal. And to put the cherry on top. Today I found out that another one of my friends is pregnant. Just doesn\'t seam fair:(
Courage2010
Courage2010

Man, you\'re journey sounds crazy with all the questions unanswered... I\'m so sorry to hear that you are going through all of this. I can\'t imagine not knowing what the problem is... What are your options? What do the docs say? How frustrating...
Yep, another one of my friends just told me that they\'re pregnant too... You know, I always used to think that people get what they deserve and what they work hard for, but with my IF, I can\'t say that I believe that at all anymore. There are people all over the place that treat their kids terribly and we would do so much to have a little one. I wrestle with that thought from time to time... Fingers crossed that we both will get there one day and when we look back, we\'ll appreciate our kids even more because we had to go through so much to get them. Hang in there! Fight for those answers you need... Let me know how things are going and if there is anything I can do to help :) HUG!
kellbell3150
kellbell3150

Yeah it is really frustrating. The doctors just keep telling me that they dont\' know why I can\'t stay pregnant, maybe it\'s just a fluke thing. I feel like there will never be an answer. I have done absolutely everything they have asked me to do and more. I know that I can\'t be the first person that has gone through this, so what is the big mystery? Why can\'t they help me? Every month I pump myself full of vitamins, pills, progesteron etc....and Im just so tired. But I can\'t seem to give up. I am going to keep fighting until I am successful. The only problem is that after 2 years of trying and 4 IUI\'s we are out of money. My oldest sister offered to carry our baby if we can\'t. That is such a selfless thing for her to offer and Im glad that is an option. However, I am just not to that point yet and don\'t know when I ever will be. I want to be the one to have morning sickness. I want to eat lots and watch my belly grow. I want to experience child birth. I do want to stay in the fight to find the answers, I just don\'t know how much fight I have in me.
Thank you for writing in my journal....makes me feel good to get little notes from others who are in the same boat.

How are you? Sorry that I have just been talking about me. I hope that you are successful with a baby very soon!

Kelly
deleted_user
deleted_user

Your story sounds a lot like mine. Please don\'t give up. It will happen, you have to keep the faith and believe it will happen.I totally know what your going through. Best of luck to you.
deleted_user
deleted_user

If you need to take progesterone, try the oil (shots). I think that made a big difference in this pregnancy.
kellbell3150
kellbell3150

Do you do the oil shots yourself? How often? Do you take them in conjunction with any other progesterone?

Thanks,

Kelly