Not So Good today (but not bad)

I had this whole long journal written and shut down my computer without posting it. I will write more tomorrow.
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Last night I was feeling not great, but I'm feeling better today. I was saying how when I went shopping yesterday, I started getting depressed because I was thinking about the triggers I wrote about the night before (my dad and the assault). I was thinking that I really had put the cart before the horse with volunteering and that I was scared to have to go in tomorrow, since I didn't feel well. (okay, I'm just going to write this like it is last night.. It doesn't make sense to write in both tenses). Tonight I have been feeling down a bit, but not really depressed. I think it's just relative because I've been feeling so good lately that any down feels more down, even though I'm back to my normal. That's why I titled it what I did, that I'm not bad but not good. I'm just normal. 
Darnit, I had all these great things written and I can't remember them. Oh well, I guess this is just going to be the lost journal of Rissa.