Not so good day

I've been doing good for about two weeks now and then today I get to work and I have a breakdown for no reason. I hate days like this and I hate the fact that I will have days like this forever. I wish I could feel happy or at least content with my life once again. I had gotten so far along with my baby girl, why did this happen? Never in a million years could I imagine the pain I feel, the hopelesness, the emptiness of my life. I need to stop and remind myself of what I still have. I have a wonderful husband and a healthy, creative son. I'm so selfish for wanting more as I already have more than some people can ever hope for, but I can't help it. I miss my Michaela, I didn't know how much I wanted her until her soul left my body. I love you precious baby, I smile knowing that I will hold you again someday.