Not Sleeping.

Hey everyone, sorry I have been absent for several weeks. I have had a lot of trouble sleeping for the last couple of months. This was so prevelant after Matthew's accident. I am sure most of you can relate. The doctors said it was because I was in shock and basically suffered a tramatic brain injury. Nothing helped, not any natural remedy or precscription helped. It actually got a lot better about a year ago, but has resurfaced. I know this journey has many setbacks and cycles.  I have continued on like usual and been going to watch Michael play his college baseball. He has had a couple of injuries and had to sit out for a couple of weeks. He is back playing now but I think he is ready for the season to be over. Not only have I suffered the loss of Matthew ( as I know others have to) but Michael's life has been so altered. He lost his brother, uncle, grandmother ( these all within 6 months) and his parents divorced (this after the first year of Matthew's death). Everything in his life was changed. He also suffers from not sleeping. It is hard to know that his heart is also broken for many reasons and I cannot do anything about it. I have to admit I feel so guilty at the fact that I could barely function after Matthew's death and Michael did not have the mother he was used to.  He and I have talked a length several times about this, and he said it was his turn to take care of me. He is amazing, and makes me so proud. I know we all have dealt with similar issues through our journeys. I try to look at what all God has given me and the blessings in my life that still make me smile. It is hard sometimes not to let my grief shadow everything. Matthews birthday is next week and I know he will be on several peoples heart. Oh how he loved his birthday. LOL Even after he got older. It amazing the little things you remember. I hope eeryone has a blessed weekend and your hearts are fille dwith joy.