No sleep
I havent been asleep since 1am. My mind is preoccupied with stuff Im dealing with. I can feel myself slipping back into my bed with the door shut to the world. I get overwhelmed and just drop back out of life in order to deal. The only thing that keeps me from staying in permanantely is my cat- he needs food and a home. If I didnt have him I think Id stay where I am and shut the world completely out. I did reach out to a counselor yesterday and waiting for them to set an appt up.
Facts are...I have to move and be on my own, I have to have this surgery.
Its overwhelming.
Replies
Whelming, it is, indeed, but the fact that you have summarized the whelming in so few words is a source of great hope in my personal senses. My denial is a noisy phenom which adds words upon words upon pure people shit with more words to stomp into the shit in hopes of finding my out from dealing directly with harsh facts. It is far, far easier to focus on anything but my own part in my personal problems. Fixing other people is so-o-o-o much more glamorous than admitting I am less than perfect.
When I can summarize my current problem set with direct simplicity, I have found my healing path. Alas, I still haven't found the healing path which leads me to that evasive, problem-free perfection. Just can't get good service these days. . .
Steadying support while you do the do. GO YOU! ! ! You can do this. I believe in you.
The reason why God gave us pets is to comfort us in times of trouble......their souls are extensions of our own souls!
God Bless