New Year, New Me

I really need to change how I am living my life. It is not okay to be lying and stealing from people that have helped me so much. I really fucked up this time and I have no idea if it is going to be okay. I know that things will never go back to they way they were but maybe the people that I hurt will forgive me one day and hopefully I can make it up to them. I do not think that my old friends will ever ever forgive me for what I have done. I do not want to do weigh ins anymore because I do not want to go back into the nurtriton club where it all happened. I hurt a lot of people and for the friends that I still have I have lied to them on what happened because I do not want to lose them so I told them it was their fault, not mine even thought it was all my fault. I really hope that Gorete really does not say anything to anyone because then it will all blow up in my face and I will be in even more shit than I am now.