New Year
breath of relief that 2011 came.... want to cut 2010 right out of my calendar and burn it. was such an ugly year. so far the new year has kicked off with mostly great news and blessings farther than i imagined pouring down on me. most of my biggest prayers are being answered one after another.
As soon as i said a prayer toward the end of the year that i didn't mean to keep God blocked off by my walls and please take my walls down.... he immediately started answering my biggest requests JUST like that!
i've been praying for a man in my life that would understand my chronic pain, fms, and my life as a veteran... suddenly I met one, and he's all of them. he has other traumas in common with me that i don't want to post here. i had planned to be just friends with the guy, but after he and his gf failed (due to her lack of understanding of his conditions).... we have found that we have feelings for each other. i have seen him around the VA clinic all of last year and ran into a lot, but we never spoke to each other until the 1st week of Dec. i was too shy and so was he.
since then, we've been spending a lot of time together, at appts, try to help each other with chores, cooking and cleaning... i help him when he's not feeling well and he does the same for me. we talk to each other about a lot of sensitive issues and try to encourage each other. we have plans to start visiting hospitalized troops/vets at least once a month, that maybe it would be therapeutic for us AND the patients as well.
mom doesn't like him very well and has problems with us possibly being together. it has caused drama. mom's been arguing with me daily.
other drama in the house:
my bro Sonnie.... he refuses to leave the cult. he has been farther brain washed by them. they teach strange things like you shouldn't own things or live in a house. they encourage their members to go homeless. they encourage families to leave their kids hungry and put the money in the "church". my brother has talked about walking away from the mortgage several times and wanting to live out of his car. he goes to their "church" after work every day for teachings and doesn't return home till 10 or 11.
he has told mom that he has changed his mind about wanting to go homeless, but i don't trust him. i'm worried sick and can't sleep right anymore. i keep waking up for hours with knots in my stomach.
one of my biggest prayers was granted last week. I won the FMS claim with the VA and they back paid me for 4 years! HOWEVER, they did not give me 100% like i thought they would. they only bumped me up to 80%. either way, i'm happy i got it.
due to this news + what my brother is doing.... i have made the decision that i will try to sever my brother from any financial ties to the house. i will try to take him off the mortgage and take him off the title. This also has been causing problems between my mom and I. adding to the arguing daily. i dont' like the way he mistreats her (disrespectful, degrading, yelling, lecturing) . but she can't seem to see it.
one more huge prayer of mine MAY be granted.... i checked with the VA: I had put a claim back in 2009 for Individual Unemployability. they said that because my FMS got approved, the claim for IU "may" now get approved. and if it does, they "may" back pay me to 2009! cross your finger and pray that this goes through. (God willing)
ok my friends.... put in your 2 cents... i wanna hear it!
love you miss you all!!! xoxoxoxo.....
As soon as i said a prayer toward the end of the year that i didn't mean to keep God blocked off by my walls and please take my walls down.... he immediately started answering my biggest requests JUST like that!
i've been praying for a man in my life that would understand my chronic pain, fms, and my life as a veteran... suddenly I met one, and he's all of them. he has other traumas in common with me that i don't want to post here. i had planned to be just friends with the guy, but after he and his gf failed (due to her lack of understanding of his conditions).... we have found that we have feelings for each other. i have seen him around the VA clinic all of last year and ran into a lot, but we never spoke to each other until the 1st week of Dec. i was too shy and so was he.
since then, we've been spending a lot of time together, at appts, try to help each other with chores, cooking and cleaning... i help him when he's not feeling well and he does the same for me. we talk to each other about a lot of sensitive issues and try to encourage each other. we have plans to start visiting hospitalized troops/vets at least once a month, that maybe it would be therapeutic for us AND the patients as well.
mom doesn't like him very well and has problems with us possibly being together. it has caused drama. mom's been arguing with me daily.
other drama in the house:
my bro Sonnie.... he refuses to leave the cult. he has been farther brain washed by them. they teach strange things like you shouldn't own things or live in a house. they encourage their members to go homeless. they encourage families to leave their kids hungry and put the money in the "church". my brother has talked about walking away from the mortgage several times and wanting to live out of his car. he goes to their "church" after work every day for teachings and doesn't return home till 10 or 11.
he has told mom that he has changed his mind about wanting to go homeless, but i don't trust him. i'm worried sick and can't sleep right anymore. i keep waking up for hours with knots in my stomach.
one of my biggest prayers was granted last week. I won the FMS claim with the VA and they back paid me for 4 years! HOWEVER, they did not give me 100% like i thought they would. they only bumped me up to 80%. either way, i'm happy i got it.
due to this news + what my brother is doing.... i have made the decision that i will try to sever my brother from any financial ties to the house. i will try to take him off the mortgage and take him off the title. This also has been causing problems between my mom and I. adding to the arguing daily. i dont' like the way he mistreats her (disrespectful, degrading, yelling, lecturing) . but she can't seem to see it.
one more huge prayer of mine MAY be granted.... i checked with the VA: I had put a claim back in 2009 for Individual Unemployability. they said that because my FMS got approved, the claim for IU "may" now get approved. and if it does, they "may" back pay me to 2009! cross your finger and pray that this goes through. (God willing)
ok my friends.... put in your 2 cents... i wanna hear it!
love you miss you all!!! xoxoxoxo.....
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