New to RA

In March of 2013, I began having some random joint pains.  The pains seemed to jump joints and at first was just irritating. Then in June of 2013 I had a very painful episode, but it only lasted about 18 hours.  After that every few months I would have random joint pains.  Never lasting very long, but it was still scary and worrisome to me.  I did see a doctor in June of 2013 who told me it was probably an injury due to exercising or maybe bursitis.  I knew in my heart that wasn't the case.  I was very reluctant to go for further testing, because I was very fearful of what it would be.  In my heart I felt like it was going to be RA, even though there isn't a family history of RA.  In March of 2015, at a visit with my primary care doctor, I told her my concerns.  She thought it would be best to test me for RA and Lupus, just to rule those out.  A week later she calls me to tell me the RF came back high, 181 IU/mL and also the ANA Screen came back positive.  So she sends me to a Rheumatologist.  While waiting to see the doctor on the day of my appointment, I felt completely overwhelmed!!! But after meeting the doctor and going through my symptoms, he gave me a lot of hope that I didn't actually have RA.  He felt as if I only had Sjogren's Syndrome.  Because one of the symptoms I have been dealing with is dry eye.  He felt very comfortable that was what I had.  So he wanted to do further testing to confirm that as well as try to rule out RA and Lupus.  I left his office very confident that was what I had, but a week later I got a phone call that has turned my world upside down.  The nurse called to say that it doesn't appear to be Sjogren's Syndrome, but the markers indicate RA, and at the next appointment he will discuss it with me further.  So now I am waiting for the next visit, and I am often loosing the battle in my mind.  I am struggling to talk with anyone about it, because I can't seem to keep from crying.  I have a good family, that I'm sure would be supportive, but I don't want to burden them with all that I am feeling.  My husband knows the DR thinks it is RA, and my children knew I was being tested, but I haven't really discussed anything with them.  I have gotten my blood work back and Googled everything about my blood work, which probable wasn't such a good idea.  I feel as if I am now borrowing from tomorrow's worry and pain.  I am scared to death of what my life will be like.  Which I know I shouldn't do, because I'm not promised tomorrow.  But I am really struggling with how to deal with this in my mind.  I know that God's Word says, His Grace is sufficient.  But I find that I am constantly having to remind myself of that. At this present time, I am experiencing very few symptoms, and I often go months in between flare ups, and only mild flare ups at that.  But since I got my results, it is always on my mind.  I go to bed thinking about it and I get up thinking about it.  I don't want to surrender my life to this disease and I don't want my family to crippled with my disease, but I just don't know how to control my emotions.  I feel comfortable that I am not alone in this.  It actually does seem to help, just being able to write all of this out and try to process what I am feeling.   I have lots of questions about my blood work and what it all means, but I guess I should wait and discuss all of that with my doctor. Right now I am just looking for a way to deal with my feelings.