New to the Group
I am new to this site and actually stumbled upon it at 1 am this morning. I had heart burn and couldn't sleep and wondered if the heart burn was caused by recent events in my life so got to wondering if there was anyone else out there who's family was as disjointed as mine and if they would want to listen to me and tell me that I was not alone.
A brief history; pregnant and married at 16. Now 60. Divorced twice. Married now for 26 years. The children; 1st child given up for adoption when he was 7. I really can't explain it but I had no feelings for him one way or the other. No matter what I did my mother-in-law criticized me and accused me of things I didn't do. Called me names and made fun of my appearance. The bond just was not there with my son because she would not allow it. Unfortunately my mother was no help. She had problems of her own. Even though I married his father and had a second child I felt very guilty because I loved my second child more than life itself (ED1). When we divorced he provided no support. I was 18, alone with 2 children. I decided to go to college for a year.
Second marriage; married my second husband who molested my daughter from my first marriage. Yep I really knew how to pick them. Had 2 more sons, (ES1 & ES2).
Third marriage: finally the right guys, accepted ED1, ES1 & ES2. Had 2 more daughters, ED2 and D3.
So if you have been keeping track I have; 2ED and 2ES and one daughter, the youngest who still talks to me.
What threw me for a loop recently was ES1. His wife who, was an only child, has this belief that such a huge family should get along like a Norman Rockwell Painting. But ours doesn't, she got into it with my son-inlaw (D3) at Thanksgiving a couple years ago. A yelling match. So she decided to start communicating with ED1. This has created animosity between several members of the family. Not that we all got along, but her butting in didn't help.
So that's it in a nutshell other than I'm not sure what I did to any of them.
Estranged from ED1=24 years, ES1=?, ES2=4 years, ESD2=6 months.
I know this sounds bad, but when I found this group I felt relief. I would say misery loves company but that's not it. I'm not miserable. I just don't care. ED1 allowed me to learn how to adjust.
A brief history; pregnant and married at 16. Now 60. Divorced twice. Married now for 26 years. The children; 1st child given up for adoption when he was 7. I really can't explain it but I had no feelings for him one way or the other. No matter what I did my mother-in-law criticized me and accused me of things I didn't do. Called me names and made fun of my appearance. The bond just was not there with my son because she would not allow it. Unfortunately my mother was no help. She had problems of her own. Even though I married his father and had a second child I felt very guilty because I loved my second child more than life itself (ED1). When we divorced he provided no support. I was 18, alone with 2 children. I decided to go to college for a year.
Second marriage; married my second husband who molested my daughter from my first marriage. Yep I really knew how to pick them. Had 2 more sons, (ES1 & ES2).
Third marriage: finally the right guys, accepted ED1, ES1 & ES2. Had 2 more daughters, ED2 and D3.
So if you have been keeping track I have; 2ED and 2ES and one daughter, the youngest who still talks to me.
What threw me for a loop recently was ES1. His wife who, was an only child, has this belief that such a huge family should get along like a Norman Rockwell Painting. But ours doesn't, she got into it with my son-inlaw (D3) at Thanksgiving a couple years ago. A yelling match. So she decided to start communicating with ED1. This has created animosity between several members of the family. Not that we all got along, but her butting in didn't help.
So that's it in a nutshell other than I'm not sure what I did to any of them.
Estranged from ED1=24 years, ES1=?, ES2=4 years, ESD2=6 months.
I know this sounds bad, but when I found this group I felt relief. I would say misery loves company but that's not it. I'm not miserable. I just don't care. ED1 allowed me to learn how to adjust.
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