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My story...

Met my wife as a sophomore in high school. Her British accent intrigued me and we hit it off well. We dated all through high school then without breaking up went our separate ways to pursue our education. Yes, we lived the fairy tale. She was Ying to my yang. We were married 4 years before having our first of two daughters. We had our challenges like all couples do but nothing major. Jump ahead to this year and we have family coming for her mother's surprise 80th birthday party on 10/8. We were on our way to pick up our twin grandsons, then take her home and get my bathing suit to go swimming with all 5 of our grandchildren while she finished preparation for the party. We were t-boned by a man that ran a stop and killed my wife immediately. I awoke in an ambulance and was life-lined with a concussion, two broken vertebrae and seven broken ribs. What makes this worse is the man that hit us is a convicted child molester that had a 15 year old boy in the truck. He has minimal insurance and owns nothing. It gets worse. We did not have life insurance and only pl/pd on he car. My mother died 5 months ago and still dealing with her estate as well. I started a small business 4 years ago and of course we weren't going to die in our early 50's so didn't get life insurance. We were going to get my wife a new car the week after the accident so minimal insurance on it. Yeah, could not have been a worse time. This Saturday will be a month since she passed.

I have a large supportive family but still found myself amazed at how you can be surrounded by loving people daily and still be lonely. 35 years of marriage to my beloved and she was gone literally in the blink of an eye. I have traveled down the rabbit hole of blame, despair, anger, etc. to the point of will this end and how? I have never feared death due to a religious upbringing but never had I welcomed it either. The physical pain of my injuries combined with the pain of the loss seemed too much. On top of this I was forced to stop my business operations due to the injuries, so I worry about money also. I am actually in good spirits, I'm alive. I can walk, talk, eat, drink, cry and laugh. The business will resume once I recover from my injuries. My goal is to leave a legacy for my children and grandchildren. I had to fight and claw my way out of the rabbit hole. As I've always said Life is full of Choices. You make the choice and that especially holds true for all of us. Put on your Big Boy Pants and get on with your life. Would your beloved want you to be where you are now? May God Bless All!