new Start
Well today was a step in the right direction I wasn't sure if I was ready, but after talking to a young lady and getting to know her over the last two weeks or so and meeting today for a face to face which lasted for 5 hours, talking about our past and what has happen to us in our other relationships, Spoke about my wife death and the lead up to it.
We are just not rushing anything, taking it slow and to learn about each other and see where it takes us.
Her last couple of relationship were mental, emotional abuse types and she's such a lovely woman and I can't understand why other men do this to women. Maybe it was my upbringing and if I treated a woman like that my Mum would have killed me. She taught me to respect women and love them with all your heart.
I know Karen would want me to move on and always have great memories of her and she would want me to make new memories.
Once the girls are ready and understand we will do that introduction slow as well, so they get to see she is not taking mum's place but standing beside her and me.
It feels good to have that spark come back and hopefully it lights the fire...that we all had with our former partner.
I would like to say when someone says to me it is too early you haven't grieved enough, well they will get told I grieved every day while Karen was doing treatment for her cancer and I watched her slowly die and I was there by her side when she passed. I will say where were you? Don't judge be happy for me and can't I find happiness again or do I have to live behind the black wall of a widower.
Mal
Replies
Hey Mal. I'm happy for ya brother. Let us know how this new relationship goes. Reading this gives me hope for the future.
Will do, taking it slow and both are not in a hurry to rush. spending time together and then see where it will go.. I will keep you posted. I have learned a lot from here and I'm grateful to the members and the support is something family and friends don't understand. The widow/widower club is very close knit of people with a very common goal to heal the broken heart.
Mal
after meeting again and her attitude changed and I started to get texts saying not interested to she wanted me and, after making my mind up that she had too many issues and she was not the person for me and ended it. She agreed and then a got a message A day later telling me about how I should grieve how I should be and that I feel guilty and it went on and on, I should have listened to my heart and not my head..... I overlooked a lot of things and looking back she was playing the victim card. because I got to see her true colours. She wasn't the victim she was part of the problem in all her relationships. step and choose wisely young soul.
Mal
It's so hard to pick yourself up and get back out there. It's good that you could see pretty quickly that she wasn't right for you. You don't need that in your life. It's tough enough. When the time is right, I believe someone will come along that will be right not only for you, but for your girls as well. Keep up the good fight Mal.