NEW MOMS

It hurts to see all the " New Moms" go through what I have been through, just a short while ago. Well, It has been 3 year's & 8 months ago, sense my son has been gone. It seems like it happened yesterday. I totally understand where you are at in the grieving process..That's actally what it is "A PROCESS".. There is nothing wrong with you. I thought I was going crazy Too...  "still feel nuts at time's"... I never thought I would ever come back out into the world again, showing signs of happiness.. I wanted to die, but I didn't. God wanted me here to help other Moms get through, all the agoney, & pain, I experienced. Thank God! We have this D.S site to go to, when we are feeling like we are cracking up. I don't know where I would be today..Some how we get through it..It was like, I broke Through to the other side...So, I don't think of it as, having a breakdown, and I was gonna end up in a nut house, CRAZY..I had a BREAK THROUGH...As "WE All DO HAVE" through the grieving process. There is NO getting around it...I'am NOW AT the stage of feeling, Something is Wrong with Me, "BECAUSE " I'am feeling almost "Normal" like before my son left this earth... If I could keep my head on straight, and continue thinking positive thoughts...I can feel the LOVE RYAN wants me to feel, B/C I know in my heart, He went before any of His family members, to protect, to show the way, to feel, LOVE, Which I had for him, and my daughter... In a Strange sort of way I alway's was afraid to LOVE, B/C of the way "LOVE HURTS"... RYAN, showed me how to LOVE, He is Guiding ME & HIS SISTER, HIS GIRL FRIEND, FRIENDS, ALL HIS FAMILY MEMBERS, through the rest of our lives, journey.. He will be at the gates of Heaven with open arms, when it is our time... POSITIVE THINKING, is the only reason I came back to life.. This is My experince, SO FAR.....  I'am so sorry my New friends for having to go through this painful journey, of losing your precious CHILD...God bless! Hugs & Love, Kelly