Nervous

Well, I kinda fell out of writing for awhile, but I would like to start again.  I need to write things down I think to keep things straight.  I am nervous about tomorrow.  I am going for my second round of blood tests to make sure that my HCG levels are doubling like they are supposed to.  I am praying that all is going to look good.  My first ultra sound is scheduled for Oct. 14th at 7 weeks to check the heart beat.  This makes me nervous for two reasons.....I am so scared that what happened last time, found no heart beat, could happent again.  Also, even if all is good, I don't know that I'll feel all that reassured.  I found out I lost my baby (missed m/c) at 8 weeks 6 days and the size of my baby was perfect.  The doc said that meant that the baby may have passed away very recently.  So, all was fine with my baby till 8 weeks.  I think once I get passed 8 weeks I will begin to feel more hopeful.  I have decided, that aside from my husband and the ladies here at DS, I am not telling anyone that I am pregnant until about 11 weeks.  I think that by 11 weeks I'll be close to the second trimester and it will be harder to keep it a secret (I tend to show early).  I just can't go through the pain of having to tell everyone again if I loose it.