Nerve Damage is FOR REALZ

I've had a lifelong struggle with diabetes management. I'm terrible at it and have been for a while, but I'm trying to take the steps to get to the place I thought I'd be by now. However, so many years of poor control has lead to many serious complications. They of course tell you the obvious consequences for not caring for yourself in the ways your illness requires.

There are the short-term affects: Lethargic, irritable, extreme thirst or hunger, weightloss.

And then there are the long-term effects: Blindness, amputation, and even death.

But those threats either seemed like nothing serious enough or so far in the future that I didn't feel the urgency of getting my shit together. They did not talk about the road in between being tired and cranky and losing my foot. I needed to hear it, but no doctor ever addressed the damage I was doing over the years. Of course I was told to get my A1C down and to test more often to prevent future complications, but every doctor I saw just kept treating my symptoms and avoiding the root cause.

Neuropathy was not something my endocrinologist, or any other doctor for that matter, ever discussed with me. Diabetic neuropathy is so common in diabetics, Type 1 and 2, that you think it would be something that your healthcare professionals would go over with you. 

According to my doctors, I have the following conditions:

Gastroparesis, IBS, Overactive Sweat Glands (Hyperhydrosis), Fibromyalgia, Elevated Heart Rate (Tachycardia), Pancreatitus, and Hypertension.

I basically have a different doctor for each system in my body. How come not one doctor mentioned that all of these were connected and my systems aligned with Autonomic Neuropathy, which affects the nerves that control involuntary bodily functions throughout the entire body. 

Even my over sweating all of the time is because of nerve damage. My aches and pains diagnosed as Fibromyalgia (over-active nerves) are because of nerve damage. Gastroparesis, due to nerve damage. Incontinence, diagnosed as IBS, nerve damage. Heart rate, blood pressure, feeling weak and lightheaded - Nerve damage. All of my symptoms have been so present for so long. How did no one make the connection? And if they did, why didn't anyone tell me? 

So much damage has been done that I don't know if having better control now is even going to save me. My body hurts and I'm tired, mentally and physically. I don't mean to sound like I'm giving up; I'm not. I'm just realizing the gravity of my situation and my choices leading up to this point.

This damage is permanent. They don't have a way to repair nerves. Do you know how hard it is to just exist when your body can't properly do all of the things it's supposed to do involuntarily? To any diabetic reading this, please take your diabetes management seriously. Don't let it get to this point before you finally decide to get it under control. I'm now dealing with so much more than just Type 1 diabetes because I didn't want to face it when I was younger. I'm now 27 after 14 & 1/2 years of living with T1 Diabetes, but I'm not sure I have another 14 & 1/2 left in me, let alone another 27.