Need Hope

Having one of my worst days yet...losing hope and my sense of humor. I can't go through this level of pain too much longer! My entire spine is in excruciating pain- like someone is sticking big needles in it! It's hard to breathe or even think. The pain doc has me on steroids this week too which is causing all the usual side effects, ie: not sleeping, mood swings, etc. I'm taking the pain meds with very little relief, wearing the lidoderm patches. I'm so far behind with everything and I really wanted to decorate for Christmas this week but I don't see how if this keeps up. Just emotionally at an all time low.