N-Wording VIII
Over the course of my abnormal life, I have wondered often if the measure of a healthy family norm is in how we handle the abnormal events and circumstances. Anybody can handle the Kodack Moments. Those smiles donae even need to be sincere. Just say, "Cheese." The accidents, illnesses, letdowns and psychotic confusions are much tougher to get through and have a far greater impact on the sincerity of the smiles in the Kodack Moments. It be the normal-for-us which gets us through the rough patches.
Whether we measure the start of our current "Normal" from the protective custody shift on August 14th or the parental deaths on September 21st, the current family norm on this little ship of fools is still far too new to feel normal to any of us. The children havenae ever known enough stability to have a family norm, far less a norm of their own. Here near the end of the second month in the new house, Big Bro and Big Sis still treat their own bedrooms like treasures to be guarded from sandbox bullies. Big Sis is currently losing her battle there. Big Bro's friends find her room the more peaceful place to hang out. She hasnae seemed too put out by the invasion.
With the system shock of Daylight Confusion Time on the immediate event horizon, the entire crew of our little ship of fools has taken to sleeping in in the morning. Even Baby Sis has been groaning like a bar fly at the school bell. This morning, even *I* slept in. Yo! ! ! Fools! ! ! Next Monday we have to get up earlier, not later. Sigh. . . I just love living ironies.
The good news is that the school train has been running efficiently through the abnormal week. So far. . . Knocking wood and whatever other stuperstitious gesticulations I can think of. Praying, too. . . Small steps, big faith and lots of prayer.
Replies
I think some times , when the abnormal has been going on so long that no one can remember if normal ever was that abnormal becomes normal and what a loop normal can throw an adjusted abnormal into in a second flat! That’s my case , and it took a lot to get to being comfortable with “normal” in fact I still waffle at times. Keeping faith and prayers with you that your family gets to it’s normal sooner rather than later and with a blessed gentleness too. Triple hugs
Dunno. . . I donae believe mini-me was so far off target when she thought the buying and selling of children was, "Normal." It was normal for her. How was she gonna know what *They* were teaching at Sunday School or even the living room next door?
Socialogically speaking, I still believe "Normal" works best as a setting on the washing machine. For this very specific little ship of fools, we *just* wanna have some clues what to expect when we open our eyes in the morning. N-Wordig in progress, though I would dearly love to have more socially acceptable words for ^it^.
Oh I hear that, sister in healing. Big hugs
No abnormal or normal...no rights and no wrongs. What is just is. Whom decided who and what was normal anyway???Still trying to figure that one out. Glad everything seems to be running effectively. Prayers for continued support and smooth sailing...or is that bussing?? How about motoring. :)
One of the dx'es in my psych portfolio is "Arithmomania." Arithmomania isnae to be confused with being an accomplished mathematician. It is a common malady within the autism and OCD spectrums.
"Normal" makes perfect sense in mathematics. A + B = B + A. What is there to argue about? When I listen to "Normal" small talk in a social context, I often feel like I'm trying to fit a rocket formula into a baby formula can. Lost in metaphor again. . .
You’re doing well Arfie. If the kids are sleeping well you must be doing something right.
Arithmomania. Well I never knew there was name for that. I count all the time, corners, tiles, fence posts, palings, posts on the side of the road. I sorta guessed it was a form of ocd or something. I’ve never even met anyone else that’s mentioned doing it too. I’m still useless at math though. I just googled the term and vampires are supposed to do it. We keep great company don’t we lol.
Thank you, Loo. It's hard to know what is what in a psychic fog. Validation greatly appreciated.
Yup, that counting thing is a type of arithmomania, Loo. Repeat, it has nothing to do with being gifted in math, though a gift for math, as in my case, sure can carry arithmomania to hysterical heights. Dustin Hoffman did the best silver screen portrayal I've ever seen of arithmomania in Rain Man. The part where Dustin bursts into statistic recitals when feeling threatened was close to my personal rendition. I don't care to do the research but I often wonder if arithmomania is a type of OCD. OCD is in my psych portfolio, as well, and the two dx'es feel quite similar inside my strictly personal skin.
A quality I enjoy about the vampires in my life is they sure have allot of experience to share.
I only read the Wikipedia explanation and it was informative but I had to laugh about the vampires. Apparently if you’re being chased by a vampire you throw a handful of grain in front of them and they are compelled to stop and count it. Sure I always keep a bag of grain in my handbag but who can ever find anything in a woman’s handbag anyway? BTW I see psychopaths like my ex as emotional vampires so no affection for their life experiences here lol.
You know what Arfie, I learn so much from you and value your opinions. In some ways we are so alike but live different lives.
Could you look at the answer on my last journal post and give me your thoughts. No problem if you can’t, I know you have so much of your own to ponder.
Massive changes and no normalcy in any of them Arf…. So much pain for all of you and now you're all doing your best to find your way to that new place where there is some joy in life
It's great that the children are enjoying their new rooms in your new home …. and it's great that you have your new home to find your new norm..... I hope that you have some more nice sleep in days..... Big hug....xo