My worries today
Last few days I've been moody as hell and so tired, like deep into my muscles, barely function tired. I feel guilty snapping when I shouldn't, but I cant stop.
It's my birthday next Tuesday and J's birthday next Thursday. We are going to my mums for tea. Mum said about maybe making potato bake. J doesn't really like it. I told mum then she gets cranky about it. Then I feel bad. And then I feel upset too cos it's our birthday.
This is why I don't want to have an actual wedding anymore. I want to get married but I don't want a wedding. Becasue this is how I'll feel.
My 18th was ruined, my engagement was ruined and I know my wedding will be too. So I gave up on something I was dreaming about my whole life.
My sister wants to move out. And I dobn't blame her. But she doesn't know how to tell mum and I don't either. And it's not really my thing. This is hers. I had to do it on my own...
I feel like an emtional and physical wreck and I just want to be left alone. I can not stop panicking and feeling worried and guilty. Its not fair that I feel so crappy. Im not even 24 yet.
It's my birthday next Tuesday and J's birthday next Thursday. We are going to my mums for tea. Mum said about maybe making potato bake. J doesn't really like it. I told mum then she gets cranky about it. Then I feel bad. And then I feel upset too cos it's our birthday.
This is why I don't want to have an actual wedding anymore. I want to get married but I don't want a wedding. Becasue this is how I'll feel.
My 18th was ruined, my engagement was ruined and I know my wedding will be too. So I gave up on something I was dreaming about my whole life.
My sister wants to move out. And I dobn't blame her. But she doesn't know how to tell mum and I don't either. And it's not really my thing. This is hers. I had to do it on my own...
I feel like an emtional and physical wreck and I just want to be left alone. I can not stop panicking and feeling worried and guilty. Its not fair that I feel so crappy. Im not even 24 yet.
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