my mind is full

i missed my ex sis-in-laws funeral. my kids and i have wondered why LDS people are buried in their temple clothes if they are sacred. if you attend a funeral like this and you aren't a member and don't know what goes on in the temple wouldn't you wonder what and why they were dressed like that. i hear that you can see parts of the actual ceremony online. even the special garments we wear once we go through the temple for the first time.
i understand that her funeral was 4 hours long, as much as i wished i could be there i wouldn't have been able to sit that long. the funeral and viewing were in Smithfield a 2 1/2 hour drive from me. my youngest daughter went but she stayed with my ex overnight.
i now have the kids for tonight which is my beautiful time that i can never replace. i might have already said this, short memory, if my daughter necole gets married to this guy she is dating she would move to slc and i wouldn't see them. just kills me thinking about it. i honestly don't know what i would do without them.
my other daughter kjera is planning on going to chilie in january and if she can take her son out of the country (needs dads permission but can't locate him) for three months. i actually think she wants to live there with her husband who moved back there a few months ago. i guess it is hard to move to where he is even though they are married.
a lot of stuff rattling around in my head. can't wait to see if i can sleep tonight and see if i can dreamĀ  like that again. have any of you felt like you were watching what was going on in the dream without actually being there? it is just a little freaky to be above it looking down. actually if i really think about it...it is pretty cool.
i want to take my grand kids for a walk around my block which has a big boarder because i live amongst culda-sacs so it is a long way around and with the heat i have to worry about my grandson getting burned. he has fair skin like me and burn but his sister tans even though she has fair skin also.
thanks for listening....hugs to all susan