my mom

well, once again she did it. She puts me down. I try not to let this happen  but when I see I am crying like a baby until my face gets horrible. As I am not working, only studying at home she and my sisters say things that makes me feel an horrible person, as if I had talent for nothing and as if no job would work for me (this is because I used to change of jobs in university, i was doing that, later i discovered, because i am bipolar, i can't stand routines). Anyway, yesterday my mom really, really hurted me. Why nothing I do is enough? I spend hours of my day studying to get a job, but in her mind this is nothing, in her mind I am nothing and I will always be. She says: you will never change!! I have told her I am bipolar but she doesn't listen or she pretends she doesn't. I am not trying to hyde myself in this bipolar thing, I just want her to understand. Thanks to the therapy I am conscious that I don't have to accept the horrible things she says about me, although it does puts me down. I know I am not nothing, I know I am fighting for what I want, everyday I am fighting and I won't simply forget what I do the way she forgets...and I won't try to do things expecting she will recognize, she will never do it, she will never understand. I thing my mom has some problem also...but don't know what it is....I just know I can't stand her behaviour...I can't.