My Lying is/has destroyed my marrage with my soul mate

Hi my name is shaun and i have a problem with lying!
i have been married for 2 years to my soulmate
i love my wife so much and would do anything for her at this point i have brought our marrage to the brink of destruction with my lying and dishonesty and its killing me inside. i dont believe i lie for attention, quite the oppersite im actually lying to avoid attention, to avoid uncomfortable situations or awkwardness etc.
i dont know at what point this all started i guess before my wife i would avoid any and all situations that would make me feel uncomfortable and awkward so i guess i didnt really notice or it didnt affect anyone for me to notice that i lie to make myself feel beeter about situations.
I know if its a big lie or a small white lie it still so soul destroying for both myslef and my wife, i just hate it so much and i want to stop and be an honest person and be the person/husband that she needs me to be!
Thank you for listening
Shaun