My Journey through Bedwetting - Part 1
Ever since I can remember, I've been a bedwetter. For so long, I was terrified about what my friends would think if they found out. Now, I've decided to share why I'm more focused on the positive.
Mom never got at me for bedwetting, as she had done it herslf until 16. Well, she did get mad if I fell asleep without wearing my GoodNite, and since I wet practically every night well into my teens, that meant I'd wake up in a soaked bed...THEN Mom would get mad. "You don't know how good you have it..." she would tell me..."having something that you can use to almost certainly hide the issue", compared to when she was a kid and GoodNites were not around. "So it upsets me when you aren't responsible enough to do something so simple!" That was the extent of her anger...no punishment, no threats, no mean names.
Dealing with friends was an entirely different issue. Since my bed always had a plastic sheet on it, I was terrified about the humiliation I thought I'd have if a friend sat down and grew suspicious about the crinkling sound. So, I always tried to go to friends houses for schoolwork, playtime, etc. On the occasssion I did have a friend over, it would always be in the living room or anywhere but my bedroom. And I never accepted sleepover invites...despite the Goodnites, I felt it would be even more humiliating to be seen in a wet GoodNite than a dry one, so I always made excuses like I had to babysit, or visit my Grandma. I made excuses for so long that many friends just stopped bothering to ask me, and some thought I was stuck up...but at that time, I would have rather been seen as stuck up than to have been seen in a pull-up diaper.
When I woke up wet...and it was almost every night well into my teens...I felt an overwhelming sense of shame. I kept missing more and more 'deadlines' to stop according to 'advice' from doctors and other sources...I'd stop by the time I started school...I'd stop after using an alarm...I'd stop after I began having periods...I'd stop once I was a teen...I'd stop at 16 because that's when Mom did...waking up to that all-too familiar feeling of cold wetness encasing me...or if I forgot to wear the GoodNite, knowing that the slightest movement in bed to the right or left would add a 'whoosh' of cold air to the dampness. On more than one occassion, I'd get out of bed to start the morning, go the the bathroom and pull down my pj bottoms, and catch myself staring in the mirror...looking at a girl who was way too old to still be wearing a diaper...and I would just start crying.
Then, in Christmas of my junior year of high school, everything changed...Mom bought me a computer. No more going to the library or staying after school for project research. One night soon after, I couldn't sleep so I surfed the internet. I googled bedwetting to see if I could find others like me, but I didn't hold my breath. I found expected websites..."Oh, there's the GoodNites website listed on the package!"...some really gross places, and then, some places that were listed as for adult or teen babies. "What the hell are they?" I asked my self, so I clicked...and found there were people who actually LIKED wearing diapers. I was so grossed out...how could anyone like wearing a diaper?...that I clicked off and went to bed.
Mom never got at me for bedwetting, as she had done it herslf until 16. Well, she did get mad if I fell asleep without wearing my GoodNite, and since I wet practically every night well into my teens, that meant I'd wake up in a soaked bed...THEN Mom would get mad. "You don't know how good you have it..." she would tell me..."having something that you can use to almost certainly hide the issue", compared to when she was a kid and GoodNites were not around. "So it upsets me when you aren't responsible enough to do something so simple!" That was the extent of her anger...no punishment, no threats, no mean names.
Dealing with friends was an entirely different issue. Since my bed always had a plastic sheet on it, I was terrified about the humiliation I thought I'd have if a friend sat down and grew suspicious about the crinkling sound. So, I always tried to go to friends houses for schoolwork, playtime, etc. On the occasssion I did have a friend over, it would always be in the living room or anywhere but my bedroom. And I never accepted sleepover invites...despite the Goodnites, I felt it would be even more humiliating to be seen in a wet GoodNite than a dry one, so I always made excuses like I had to babysit, or visit my Grandma. I made excuses for so long that many friends just stopped bothering to ask me, and some thought I was stuck up...but at that time, I would have rather been seen as stuck up than to have been seen in a pull-up diaper.
When I woke up wet...and it was almost every night well into my teens...I felt an overwhelming sense of shame. I kept missing more and more 'deadlines' to stop according to 'advice' from doctors and other sources...I'd stop by the time I started school...I'd stop after using an alarm...I'd stop after I began having periods...I'd stop once I was a teen...I'd stop at 16 because that's when Mom did...waking up to that all-too familiar feeling of cold wetness encasing me...or if I forgot to wear the GoodNite, knowing that the slightest movement in bed to the right or left would add a 'whoosh' of cold air to the dampness. On more than one occassion, I'd get out of bed to start the morning, go the the bathroom and pull down my pj bottoms, and catch myself staring in the mirror...looking at a girl who was way too old to still be wearing a diaper...and I would just start crying.
Then, in Christmas of my junior year of high school, everything changed...Mom bought me a computer. No more going to the library or staying after school for project research. One night soon after, I couldn't sleep so I surfed the internet. I googled bedwetting to see if I could find others like me, but I didn't hold my breath. I found expected websites..."Oh, there's the GoodNites website listed on the package!"...some really gross places, and then, some places that were listed as for adult or teen babies. "What the hell are they?" I asked my self, so I clicked...and found there were people who actually LIKED wearing diapers. I was so grossed out...how could anyone like wearing a diaper?...that I clicked off and went to bed.
Replies
You are a very brave girl!