My hyper focus/obsessive thinking/emotional intensity

I'm really overwhelmed & embarrassed by my intense anxiety & fixation on non-priority projects. Each day is so discouraging b/c I can't ever do what i plan/what's imPortant & can't control myself. The last 10 days I've hyper focused on a huge photo Project of photos tht hv bn piling up for 3-4 yrs & I hate doing it so much but I know if I don't finally face it, it'll only get worse & bigger. It's really important to me to hv our pictures in Photo albums so the pictures will get looked at & finally slapped tOvether a baby book for my youngest son who is almost two.

I get motivated by novelty & learning new things so since I've bn on disability & not able to work the past few yrs, I dove into being an at-home mom, but now on my 3rd child, I am so bored w it & everything seems like such drudgery. So doing something tedious like family scrapbooks feels as horrible & unpleasant as doing my taxes.
With my ADD & brain injury symptoms, tedious, bOring detailed things are so hard for me that in order to even be able to do it, perhaPs the intense negativeO feelings provides the fOcus or at least the only way I'm able to do complicated multistory tasks are to be Intensely focused & it physically exhausts me & the intense negative feelings feel like tht's all there is in life & it causes intense hopeless feelings.

I have urgent projects to work on such as taxes & bills but I hv severe avoidant behavior & today I'm discouraged tht nothing will ever get better. Advice abt self-control--I'm sick of it--I can't control my fixated brain & don't hv anyone who understands.

I know the Adderall helPs me focus but alsO causes hyper focus. I just took Tylenol & Klonopin to try to calm down. Does anyOne out there ever suffer from any of this?

I'm feeling so discouraged & hopeless. I can't even ever enjoy my 3 wonderful kids b/c I'm so fixated on completing projects & it's bn this way for yrs.