My Heart Hurts

Today I had to say goodbye to my boyfriend, he left this morning with his mom to go to rehab about 7 hours away from here. He was my neighbor and one of the only people i have. Now we have to barely keep in touch through Facebook or Textnow, and i do not have a phone, but i use my sisters laptop when it's available. We met in December and we spent most of our time together doing drugs and drinking, and it was after we were together that i relapsed on side. During the first week of dating him he was kicked out because he stole his brothers phone and me being the romantic i am, decided to stay with him and stick it out on the streets (My mother wouldn't let him stay, and i do not have a place.) While we were sitting outside a homeless shelter we were offered side and i smoked it for the first time since summer. Now i feel as though the addiction is unreal and strong as steel. My sister also ended up staying on the streets with us one night because she snuck in her boyfriend and was kicked out for awhile. So anyways, i have been incredibly down all day because he's gone, and my sister and him are the only people who have been standing by me. This was kind of a wake up call though because now i don't have as good of access to side and i can focus on getting clean and being happy sober and living a fulfilling life. Dating an addict when you are one is really tough and depending on how it works long distance, it might be best to move on. But i feel my heartbreak when i think about leaving him, I'm so confused. Been bingeing with him and my sister for awhile now, today is my first day clean, feeling shitty as hell.