My health in a nut shell
"I have never seen anything like this before. What you have is quite rare and I'm afraid there is no cure for it." It's not very often that a 17 year-old girl hears that from her doctor. Everyone is always looking for the simple solution where they will be put on medication and feel all better in a few weeks. However, after two years you begin to realize that being sick is the new normal. Your surroundings start to change and nothing feels the same.
People feel intimidated by anything foreign and would prevent change at all costs. As this disease started to affect my social life; friends would come and go. You take note as to who will always be there and who moves on with their own lives. The few people who are constantly following up would give anything to see the smile that once brightened everyones day. Doctors continuously grow baffled by test results while my parents cringe at the sight of my pain. You depend on memories to bring you happiness since the present is nothing but confusion and stress. Even though you want to be seen as "normal" in society's eyes, your body and mind won't allow it.
Just because you become chronically ill doesn't mean that the world will be put on pause. You are still being depended on to go to school, work, and extracurriculars, all while living the life of a teenager. Functioning despite the pain is your only option. Although, the challenges that entails start to over power your mind. Your dreams, conversations, nightmares, fears and wishes all begin to revolve around this disease. All you want to do is give up, but loved ones tell you to keep fighting because you are stronger than what is hurting you on the inside.
Eventually you will come across someone who will inspire you to push forward and see the light at the end of the tunnel. They will make you accept your new normal and encourage you to build your life around it. The days when the pain is bearable you tell yourself that it's going to be a good day and you have so much to be thankful for. Then on the days when you can't take the pain anymore you will look for comfort and a loving "I'm here for you." That one person becomes your foundation of happiness because you know they have what it takes to make you feel better even when medicine can't. You hang on to that person and always look out for him or her because you know that without them, everyday would be unbearable.
"Whenever you find yourself doubting how far you can go, just remember how far you have come. Remember everything you have faced , all of the battles you have won, and all of the fears you have overcome."
People feel intimidated by anything foreign and would prevent change at all costs. As this disease started to affect my social life; friends would come and go. You take note as to who will always be there and who moves on with their own lives. The few people who are constantly following up would give anything to see the smile that once brightened everyones day. Doctors continuously grow baffled by test results while my parents cringe at the sight of my pain. You depend on memories to bring you happiness since the present is nothing but confusion and stress. Even though you want to be seen as "normal" in society's eyes, your body and mind won't allow it.
Just because you become chronically ill doesn't mean that the world will be put on pause. You are still being depended on to go to school, work, and extracurriculars, all while living the life of a teenager. Functioning despite the pain is your only option. Although, the challenges that entails start to over power your mind. Your dreams, conversations, nightmares, fears and wishes all begin to revolve around this disease. All you want to do is give up, but loved ones tell you to keep fighting because you are stronger than what is hurting you on the inside.
Eventually you will come across someone who will inspire you to push forward and see the light at the end of the tunnel. They will make you accept your new normal and encourage you to build your life around it. The days when the pain is bearable you tell yourself that it's going to be a good day and you have so much to be thankful for. Then on the days when you can't take the pain anymore you will look for comfort and a loving "I'm here for you." That one person becomes your foundation of happiness because you know they have what it takes to make you feel better even when medicine can't. You hang on to that person and always look out for him or her because you know that without them, everyday would be unbearable.
"Whenever you find yourself doubting how far you can go, just remember how far you have come. Remember everything you have faced , all of the battles you have won, and all of the fears you have overcome."
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