My doc appoint today
Went to my scheduled doc appoint today. I go up to counter to check in and they say they cant find my file. So the nurse checks the computer. She says"your appoint shows cancelled". I ask her why?She looks at the computer again and says" Are you not pregnant anymore?"..My heart sank. WTF!!!!!! this is my doctors office that I have been goin to since I was 7 weeks along. Why would she have to ask me that? I took a deep beath and said "No, my son passed away at 27 weeks" Of course there are pregnant woman there right behind hearing all of this.The nurse then tells me that"they must have canceled it because it was a prenatel appoint. Im sorry but we can still get you in today for a check up" I wanted to just curl up and die. I hated seeing all these pregnant woman.I hate seeing there ever so growing bellies and I was angry that Im not looking down to see the huge baby bump I should have right now. Well Im sitting there in the waiting room and a nurse calls one of the other patients up. I could here the nurse ask her how she was doing and the woman made a grunting sound like it was just so horable to be burdened by the effects of pregancy. After she made the sound I heard the nurse say "well its nice to see she( the baby) is still here" I did good up to that point. After hearing that I just wanted to scream. like "thanx for rubbing it in. So happy for ya, not all of us get that happy ending and how dare you "grunt" when asked how your doing. how would you feel if one day you woke up and the baby wasnt there anymore? would you "grunt" then?"... But I just sat there and tryed to hold in the tears. I finnaly see my doc and made her a lil pic of Max with a saying and framed it. She cryed when I gave it to her. It was just something to remember him by and she was shocked, yet happy that I thought of her. I told her she was his doctor and thought that she would like it. Anyhow, We dicussed when I plan on trying again. Thinking around June. She said thats good, and they will do everything they can to make sure this one doesnt join Max in heaven. She gave me paper work to start test to make sure Im okay to start again, and was very supportive. The nurse in there told me she lost 5 babies in between her 2 boys but never gave up. Im hoping and praying that someday I can go back to that doc office and not cry tears of sadness but ones of happiness.
Replies
You know, you would think that these offices would know better. I\'m so sorry you had to go thru that, but it sounds like the actual appt went well. I too hope that one day I will be able to go to my docs office with tears of happiness. Hugs!
What a terrible experience to have at a doctor\'s office. When I had a miscarriage a couple of years ago, (not as bad as you losing your baby at 27 weeks)I went back to see my doc a couple of times to check my levels etc. Anyway, EACH of the three times I went, she congratulated me on my pregnancy. EVERY FRICKIN\' TIME! I guess she was just looking at my HCG level and not comparing it to the previous tests. If she had, she would have noticed that my levels had been dropping.I was soooo mad. And a receptionnist at the same place told me that maybe the HCG tests were wrong and maybe I was still pregnant! I would have done anything for that to be true and at that point, that\'s all you want to hear but that is SO unprofessional!!
I know you\'re sad and this certainly didn\'t help, but take care of yourself. It\'s hard to see now, but you will be happy again. Hugs, Julia
Thinking of you sweetie. So sorry about the doc... Had a bad experience myself afterwards, It\'s just one of those things we chalk up to the emotionally stunted people who could never understand what we go through. Praying for you, my dear. Miss you.
Meghan
So sorry you had to go through that!! I lost my daughter when she was 8 months old to SIDS. For the first 2 years I went back to my OB/GYN, they totally cleared the schedule so that I wouldn\'t have to see pregnant women or infants. That\'s the way a doctor\'s office should be!
And here\'s yet another example of how insensitive and stupid people are! It\'s 100 times worse that it was your doctors office, they should definitely know better. I\'m sorry you had to go through this. It\'s really hard to see pregnant women. It\'s even still difficult for me now (even though I\'m pregnant again). It\'s different for these women, because they are still naive and totally blind to the fact that bringing a life into the world isn\'t as easy as they think. They breeze along, feeling as if the end result of a living baby is a given. We know better. However, I wish we didn\'t.
I hope and pray for the day when you can walk into that office with tears of joy too. Lots of hugs, Sam.
I\'m so sorry to hear about your experience today! I had a very similar experience when I had to go back for a couple of appointments after losing my son. It makes you wish they had a waiting room on the opposite site of the building so that no one has to sit there and stare, in devestation, at the new moms-to-be. You\'d think the offices would have figured that out by now. Those are the kinds of experiences that make us feel so alone.
Sorry that happened to you! I make them take me back to an empty examining room and wait there so I don\'t have to sit in there with all the pregnant women. In fact, when I make the appt I remind them who I am and make sure they will have an empty waiting room for me and add it in my notes. We are going to TTC in June/July, maybe we can cry tear of joy together!
Every time I had to call or go into my doc. office I had to explain all over again, I could never make it through without crying. I hate that the one place that should know what happend alwas seemes to have no clue.