My Diagnosis

In August of 2016 I began getting large, uncomfortable bumps in my right armpit. By October one had burst and left a 1/2 inch deep, 3 x 2 inch round hole in my arm. I was in the process of a move, so I was doing 2 hour drives to my doctor for assessments. When my doctor first saw it he claimed it was a cyst and sent me to a general surgeon. The general surgeon sent me back 2 hrs to my new city to the hospital where care nurses dressed and cleaned my wound. I found a new Dr. in my city and she sent me to a dermatologist who sent me to a plastic surgeon who sent me back to the dermatologist.

As you can tell I've been tossed around alot. Since then the "hole" in my right arm has closed up into a tiny pin hole that still leaks pus daily, and my left armpit has flared up. I have two holes both leak pus and sometimes blood. Both arms are constantly painful, I've lost some feeling at the back of my left arm due to what my dermatologist thinks is nerve damage. Just recently I agreed to Humira and and have undergone my first round. I was not sick in the days following, and did not experience any side effects.

I still get my arms cleaned by Care Nurses every three days and they can't believe that I am still at this stage.

Due to all the confusion, I have developed anxiety and severe depression. I had to quit my job because I couldn't make it through my shifts, but my boss was understanding and did invite me to come see her when I felt better, now I'm worried I'll never feel better.

The depression is crippling. To the point where I have spent 5 hours sitting on the floor crying because my bandage was stuck, and then it wasn't about that anymore it was because this is my life now.

I have 50,000 dollars in school debt and have not even begun to pay it off, as well the programs I went to school for require physical activity to preform the job. A job I don't think I can do any longer.

But staying positive has become one of my new daily tasks.

I am alive today. Thats what matters.

My feelings tomorrow may be a different story.