More storm clouds......

Well, I knew that this week would be flooded with good things, or just be filled with storm clouds.  Right now, we are being overwhelmed with the storm clouds.  As many of you may have read, Tuesday we did not get the kids.  I guess the mom is reconsidering and may allow the kids to be placed with us without objecting again.  Who knows though- we are being told next Thursday for placement- which would give me a week until I start back at work for the school year.  Still not confident that it will happen. 
Yesterday I went to the Dr., as I have been feeling like junk for so long, and have had acid reflux and heartburn the past week, and have been feeling pukey throughout the days.  Well- her conclusion is that I am overly stressed- no kidding.  However, the fact is she thinks the stress is causing the acid, which is making me nauseous.  I have been given a prescription to help with the acid, because she warned me that if I don't get things under control I am going to end up with an ulcer- that isn't what I wanted to hear.... just another storm cloud.
To add to yesterday's news from my doctor, my dad went to the doctor for a followup yesterday.  Back in April he tore something in his knee.  When he went in for surgery it was discovered that his heart was beating our of rythym, but they couldn't figure out why- he is only 56.  He went through many tests and they can't find any reason that this was happening.  The heart specialist decided to shock his heart back into rythym, which they did about a month ago.  Things went well during the procedure.  Yesterday he went in for his check-up to get the all clear and have his restrictions taken off.  Well, things didn't go as planned.  They checked his heart, and it is out of rhythm again.  The doctor didn't know what to say, as my dad is one of the youngest patients this doctor has treated for this problem.  He told my dad that he is too young for the medication, and too young for a pacemaker.  My dad didn't take the news well and was crying- something I have only seen my dad do a handful of times in my life.  I know that he is afraid and so worried.  When I talked to him last night he said that this week was supposed to be full of good news and happiness for all of us, and starting Tuesday at the foster hearing we have gotten nothing but bad knews.  Last night I just had a breakdown after talking with him.  I can't imagine having something happen to my dad at this point in my life.
So the last thing I am waiting for to happen is AF to show anytime now.  I finally broke down to and counted the calendar to see when she should be coming.  It depends on what day I count as day one- so either yesterday, today or tomorrow.  I've been cramping for the past few days and just wish it would come and be done with.  We leave tonight for an out of town wedding- stupid us got a suite at the hotel with a hot tub- won't that be great if AF shows on time!  Because our week has gone the way that it has thus far, I know that AF is going to show..... when it rains it pours...... and we will be flooded by Sunday on my birthday.....  I am fearful of how the rest of the weekend will go.... I suspect nothing good is going to happen.
Praying for a life preserver sometime soon before I drown....

Replies

deleted_user
deleted_user

Sounds like you need a boat!! I\'m sorry things are so tough. These tough times can make us appreciate the good times that much more. I\'m still praying that you get those precious little ones. I\'ll add your dad to the prayer list--it\'s a tough thing to see your father crying--and I hope the doc\'s find some info soon!
Lili
Lili

I\'m so sorry for all you\'re dealing with right now! I don\'t know why things have to go this way sometimes...I remember many times I felt like you do now over the years, and told God I just couldn\'t take any more! I don\'t know how I made it through it all, but somehow He got me through. And He will get you through this time as well!! Just keep hanging on. I will be praying for you...for the overall child situation, and for your dad too! Big hugs to you!